rations for my spring offensive. But, as always happens when the
poor British start attacking, rain began falling in bucketfuls the
very first day of operations. The advance had to be stopped after a
few acres, and public opinion is really much exercised about the
matter.

Now I want to answer your letter. You say, "Some of you in England
seem astonished that we refuse to trust the Germans. We are accused
of a lack of generosity. What a splendid piece of unconscious
humour! I'd like to see you in our shoes--suppose there were no sea
between those chaps and yourselves!"

My dear Aurelle, I have often asked you not to confuse the English
people with their cursed Puritans. There have always been in this
country a large number of men who have done their best to destroy the
strength and reputation of our Empire. Up to the time of good Queen
Bess, these scoundrels were kept in their place, and I often regret I
was not born in those times. Since then the Puritan element has on
every occasion displayed its narrow-mindedness and its hatred of
patriotism and of everything beautiful and joyous. The Puritans
prefer their opinions to their country, which is an abominable
heresy. They brought the civil wars upon us at the time of the
Stuarts; they helped the rebels during the American War of
Independence and the French during their Revolution. They were
pro-Boers in the South African War, conscientious objectors in this
one, and now they are supporting the republican murderers in Ireland,
trying to undermine the British workman's faith in his King and
county cricket, and doing their best to encourage the Germans by
creating difficulties between France and ourselves.

But you must not forget that the magnificent indifference and
ignorance of our race makes these pedants quite harmless.

You ask me what the average British citizen thinks about it all.
Well, I'm going to tell you.

What interests the average British citizen beyond everything is the
match between England and Scotland, which is to be played next
Saturday at Twickenham, the Grand National, which is to be run next
week at Liverpool, and Mrs. Bamberger's divorce, which fills the
newspapers just now.

What does the British citizen think? Well, he went to the war without
knowing what it was all about, and he has come back from it without
having gathered any further information. As a matter of fact, he is
beginning to wonder who won it. You say it was Foch, and we are q