lunch with and who to say, "I don't get you!"
to--which is a art! As a result, she had never got no further than
sellin' shirtwaists and had her first home to break up. She never
advanced beyond that counter--up or down! Many a necktie salesman had
flashed Gladys and gone right out to buy the tickets, before he even
asked her would she look over a show, windin' up by throwin' 'em away
and tellin' her what a sweet old woman his mother was and how strong he
was for his own gas meter. That was Gladys. She looked like what she
wasn't, and she fooled 'em all.

All but Harold!

I found Gladys very easy to look at myself, and I helped the Sante Fe
over a tough year by runnin' over to Frisco to the Busy Bee whenever I
could get away. It took me a short month to find out that I had the
same chance of winnin' out as I'd have of gettin' elected King of
Montenegro by acclamation, because Harold had been there first and got
in his deadly work.

I was standin' in the next aisle to where Gladys held forth, one
afternoon, waitin' for a couple of fatheads to call it a day and move
away from the counter, when along comes Harold. As usual, he was all
dressed up like a horse, with the even fare back to Film City in them
one-way pockets of his. He butts right into the conversation, and I
nearly fainted when he passes a box of candy over to Gladys. Then I
seen the label on the package, and I revived, because it was one of a
dozen that some simp had sent Miss Vincent and in order to please the
Kid she had give 'em all away. Harold had brought his all the way over
to Frisco on a ticket furnished by the Maudlin Movin' Picture Company,
which sent him over for props.

Well, Harold gets warmed up and in a minute he's press agentin' himself
at the rate of fifty-five words a minute--I clocked him! He tells
Gladys he's bein' _starred_ in "The End of the World" and the amount of
money they're payin' him would startle Europe, if it ever got out. He
claims he made 'em all faint at the rehearsals and offers from other
companies is comin' in so fast that he's got a charley horse on his
thumb from openin' telegrams. From that he works into the fact that
after the picture is made he's gonna run around Europe--that's just the
way he said it, "Run around Europe!" Oh, boy!--that bein' the way he
usually spent his vacations. When Gladys staggers over to wait on a
customer, Harold charges himself up again and when she comes back he's
off to a