kness was the effect of my resistance," and I believed it would,
through my writing, go off again. He asked, "But what is it you will
write?"

I replied, "I know nothing of it, nor desire to know, leaving it
entirely to God to direct me."

He ordered me to do so. At my taking the pen I knew not the first word
I should write; when I began, suitable matter flowed copiously, nay,
impetuously. As I was writing I was relieved and grew better. I wrote
an entire treatise on the interior path of faith, under the comparison
of torrents, or of streams and rivers.

As the way, wherein God now conducted Father La Combe, was very
different from that in which he had formerly walked (all light,
knowledge, ardor, assurance, sentiment) now the poor, low, despised
path of faith, and of nakedness; he found it very hard to submit
thereto. Who could express what it has cost my heart before he was
formed according to the will of God?

Meanwhile, the possession which the Lord had of my soul became every
day stronger, insomuch that I passed whole days without being able to
pronounce one word. The Lord was pleased to make me pass wholly into
Him by an entire internal transformation. He became more and more the
absolute master of my heart, to such a degree as not to leave me a
movement of my own. This state did not hinder me from condescending to
my sister, and the others in the house. Nevertheless, the useless
things with which they were taken up could not interest me. That was
what induced me to ask leave to make a retreat, to let myself be
possessed of Him who holds me so closely to Himself after an ineffable
manner.

CHAPTER 12

I had at that time so ardent a desire for the perfection of Father La
Combe, and to see him thoroughly die to himself, that I could have
wished him all the crosses and afflictions imaginable, that might
conduce to this great and blessed end. Whenever he was unfaithful, or
looked at things in any other light than the true one--to tend to this
death of self--I felt myself on the rack, which, as I had till then
been so indifferent, very much surprised me. To the Lord I made my
complaint; He graciously encouraged me, both on this subject and on
that entire dependence on Himself which He gave me, which was such that
I was like a new born infant.

My sister had brought me a maid, whom God was willing to give me to
fashion according to His will, not without some crucifixion to myself.
I believe it never is