bited a "Cob of ADAM's Early Maize." No particulars
are given. Was it 14'1 and a weight-carrier? Being ADAM's, it must be
about the oldest in the world. "Maize" may be a misprint for "Mews."
Next time the Baroness must send a pear.
* * * * *
PROBABLE DEDUCTION.--A pertinacious Salvation Army Captain was
worrying a Scotch farmer, whom he had met in the train, with perpetual
inquiries as to whether "he had been born again of Water and the
Spirit?" At last, MCSANDY replied, "Aweel, I dinna reetly ken how
that may be, but my good old feyther and mither took their toddy
releegiously every nicht, the noo."
* * * * *
THE AUSTRO-GERMAN OFFICER'S VADE-MECUM.
_Q._ You have heard of the Ride from Berlin to Vienna, and _vice
versa_?
_A._ Yes; and of the mishaps that befell many of the competitors.
_Q._ You mean their horses?
_A._ What applies to the one applies to the other.
_Q._ Some of the poor steeds died on the journey?
_A._ I daresay--of course, it was hard work.
_Q._ And you have read that, even when the poor horses were fainting
and refusing food, the riders still went on?
_A._ Of course. The riders had magnificent pluck and nerve.
_Q._ What, to observe the anguish of their chargers without emotion?
_A._ No! The idea! I mean they had pluck and nerve in spite of all
discouragement to push on to the winning-post.
_Q._ And what do you think this breaking down of the horses proved?
_A._ That, after all, the creatures were brutes--only brutes!
_Q._ Does not the suffering of these brutes suggest--
_A._ That the riders were brutes too?--Ah!
[_No further question put, the Answerer having mastered the
subject._
* * * * *
IN EXCELSIS.--No better example of the methods employed by
Vivisectionists could be given than was presented at the Church
Congress last week, where in debate on this subject they were all
engaged in cutting up one another. The Bishop of EDINBURGH, denouncing
the morality of the Bishop of MANCHESTER and of Bishop BARRY, was a
rare sight. His Lordship said that the morality of these two Bishops
was "up in a balloon." Well, surely this is morality of the most
elevated description. These Bishops are not "_in partibus_," but _in
nubibus_.
* * * * *
IN WATER COLOURS.--The East London Waterworks Company had a very
successful meeting the othe
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