hy Mother must hear thee if thou wilt needs utter
thy Follies; we cannot help it, Friend, I say: if thou wilt we must
hear thee: But if thou wert a Man of Understanding, thou wouldst not
take Advantage of thy courageous Countenance to abash us Children of
Peace. Thou art, thou sayest, a Soldier; give Quarter to us, who
cannot resist thee. Why didst thou fleer at our Friend, who feigned
himself asleep? he [said [2]] nothing: but how dost thou know what he
containeth? If thou speakest improper things in the hearing of this
virtuous young Virgin, consider it is an Outrage against a distressed
Person that cannot get from thee: To speak indiscreetly what we are
obliged to hear, by being hasped up with thee in this publick Vehicle,
is in some Degree assaulting on the high Road.'

Here _Ephraim_ paused, and the Captain with an happy and uncommon
Impudence (which can be convicted and support it self at the same time)
cries,

'Faith, Friend, I thank thee; I should have been a little impertinent
if thou hadst not reprimanded me. Come, thou art, I see, a smoaky old
Fellow, and I'll be very orderly the ensuing Part of the Journey. I
was [going [3]] to give my self Airs, but, Ladies, I beg Pardon.'

The Captain was so little out of Humour, and our Company was so far from
being sowered by this little Ruffle, that _Ephraim_ and he took a
particular Delight in being agreeable to each other for the future; and
assumed their different Provinces in the Conduct of the Company. Our
Reckonings, Apartments, and Accommodation, fell under _Ephraim:_ and the
Captain looked to all Disputes on the Road, as the good Behaviour of our
Coachman, and the Right we had of taking Place as going to _London_ of
all Vehicles coming from thence. The Occurrences we met with were
ordinary, and very little happened which could entertain by the Relation
of them: But when I consider'd the Company we were in, I took it for no
small good Fortune that the whole Journey was not spent in
Impertinences, which to one Part of us might be an Entertainment, to the
other a Suffering.

What therefore _Ephraim_ said when we were almost arriv'd at _London_,
had to me an Air not only of good Understanding but good Breeding. Upon
the young Lady's expressing her Satisfaction in the Journey, and
declaring how delightful it had been to her, _Ephraim_ declared himself
as follows:

'There is no ordinary Part of humane Life which expresseth so much