uch.

* * * * *

"With the exception of the police, Press representatives, and
photographers there were comparatively few people in the
thoroughfare. The photographers were requested by the police to
refrain from operating, and they withdrew, while the remainder
found their virgil very cold and unexciting."

_Newcastle Daily Journal._

We confess that the Roman poet often used to leave us cold and unexcited
too.

* * * * *

[Illustration: _First Motorist_ (_after very narrow shave_). "But _why_
all this fuss? We haven't damaged you. You can't bring an action against
us."

_Second Motorist._ "I _know_ I can't, sir, I _know_ I cant; that's just
my point."]

* * * * *

LOVE'S LABOUR.

I walked into Charles's room with undoubted meaning--that is to say, he
could see I intended to be there.

"Hello!" said Charles. "Help yourself to a chair."

"Thanks," I said--"thanks," and I sat down.

Charles looked at me thoughtfully. "There's something the matter," he
said.

"Ah! You've noticed it too, Charles. I thought so myself."

"Have you any idea what it is?" he asked.

I looked him steadily in the face. "Charles," I began, "you are a
stockbroker. You know the value of money." He groaned.

"Very well, I have a question to ask you--a simple financial question.
It is this. What, in your opinion as a stockbroker, a level-headed
stockbroker, is the least one can start on?"

"It all depends," he said. "Of course there's the deposit of securities,
L1000, and then--"

I waved my hand. "My dear man," I said, "I'm not thinking of marrying
the Stock Exchange."

Charles closed his eyes. "Good Lord," he murmured. "Poor old thing. I
never thought of this. Take a cigarette--or perhaps you don't smoke
now."

I took a cigarette with a fine independence. I carried it further and
borrowed a match.

"Now," I said, "we must try and keep to the point. What is the least one
can start on?"

"I don't know," he replied. "I've never begun. By the way, I must
congratulate you. Who is she?"

"Daphne," I said, and smiled wanly.

"You don't look well."

"I love her," I said simply, and the pathos of it all fairly gripped me.

Charles smoothed his hair. "We'd better stick to business," he said.

In an instant I was a business man. "Right," I said crisply. "Let me put
the question in another way. What is the