voice--my dear, I never
heard him speak without feeling a softness of which it is impossible to
convey an idea.

But I am wrong to encourage a tenderness which is already too great;
I will think less of him; I will not talk of him; do not speak of him
to me, my dear Bell: talk to me of Fitzgerald; there is no danger of
your passion becoming too violent.

I wish you loved more tenderly, my dearest; you would then be more
indulgent to my weakness: I am ashamed of owning it even to you.

Ashamed, did I say? no, I rather glory in loving the most amiable,
the most angelic of mankind.

Speak of him to me for ever; I abhor all conversation of which he is
not the subject. I am interrupted. Adieu!

Your faithful
Emily.

My dearest, I tremble; he is at the door; how shall I meet him
without betraying all the weakness of my heart? come to me this moment,
I will not go down without you. Your father is come to fetch me;
follow me, I entreat: I cannot see him alone; my heart is too much
softened at this moment. He must not know to what excess he is beloved.

LETTER 109.

To Mrs. Temple, Pall Mall.

Quebec, March 28.

I am at present, my dear Lucy, extremely embarrassed; Madame Des
Roches is at Quebec: it is impossible for me not to be more than polite
to her; yet my Emily has all my heart, and demands all my attention;
there is but one way of seeing them both as often as I wish; 'tis to
bring them as often as possible together: I wish extremely that Emily
would visit her, but 'tis a point of the utmost delicacy to manage.

Will it not on reflection be cruel to Madame Des Roches? I know her
generosity of mind, but I also know the weakness of the human heart:
can she see with pleasure a beloved rival?

My Lucy, I never so much wanted your advice: I will consult Bell
Fermor, who knows every thought of my Emily's heart.

Eleven o'clock.

I have visited Madame Des Roches at her relation's; she received me
with a pleasure which was too visible not to be observed by all
present: she blushed, her voice faltered when she addressed me; her
eyes had a softness which seemed to reproach my insensibility: I was
shocked at the idea of having inspired her with a tenderness not in my
power to return; I was afraid of increasing that tenderness; I scarce
dared to meet her looks.

I felt a criminal in the presence of this amiable woman; for both
our sakes, I must see her seldom: yet what an appearance will m