ious as I am of deserving
approbation and not censure, of having passed my life in acts of
justice and philanthropy, can any thing be more deplorable than for me
to answer to a charge of murder? So wretched is my situation, that I
cannot accept your gratuitous acquittal, if you should be disposed to
bestow it. I must answer to an imputation, the very thought of which is
ten thousand times worse to me than death. I must exert the whole energy
of my mind, to prevent my being ranked with the vilest of men.
"Gentlemen, this is a situation in which a man may be allowed to boast.
Accursed situation! No man need envy me the vile and polluted triumph I
am now to gain! I have called no witnesses to my character. Great God!
what sort of character is that which must be supported by witnesses?
But, if I must speak, look round the company, ask of every one present,
enquire of your own hearts! Not one word of reproach was ever whispered
against me. I do not hesitate to call upon those who have known me most,
to afford me the most honourable testimony.
"My life has been spent in the keenest and most unintermitted
sensibility to reputation. I am almost indifferent as to what shall be
the event of this day. I would not open my mouth upon the occasion, if
my life were the only thing that was at stake. It is not in the power of
your decision to restore to me my unblemished reputation, to obliterate
the disgrace I have suffered, or to prevent it from being remembered
that I have been brought to examination upon a charge of murder. Your
decision can never have the efficacy to prevent the miserable remains of
my existence from being the most intolerable of all burthens.
"I am accused of having committed murder upon the body of Barnabas
Tyrrel. I would most joyfully have given every farthing I possess, and
devoted myself to perpetual beggary, to have preserved his life. His
life was precious to me, beyond that of all mankind. In my opinion, the
greatest injustice committed by his unknown assassin was that of
defrauding me of my just revenge. I confess that I would have called him
out to the field, and that our encounter should not have been terminated
but by the death of one or both of us. This would have been a pitiful
and inadequate compensation for his unparalleled insult, but it was all
that remained.
"I ask for no pity, but I must openly declare that never was any
misfortune so horrible as mine. I would willingly have taken refuge
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