r the least observant person to imagine
there was a particle of brains in it. The arrangement had also another
disadvantage. The cauda stuck out nearly at right angles with the
position of the body, and besides occupying much more space than would
probably be permitted in the royal presence, "it gave any jackanapes,"
as Noah observed, "the great advantage over us, of making us yaw at
pleasure, since he might use the outriggers as levers." But a seaman is
inexhaustible in expedients. Two "back-stays," or "bob-stays" (for the
captain facetiously gave them both appellations) were soon "turned in,"
and the tails were "stayed in, in a way to bring them as upright as
trysail masts"; to which spars, indeed, according to Noah's account of
the matter, they bore no small resemblance.

The envoy-extraordinary of Leaplow, accompanied by his friend, Brigadier
Downright, arrived just as we were dressed; and a most extraordinary
figure the former cut, if truth must be said. Although obliged to be
docked, according to the Leaplow law, to six inches, and brought down to
a real bob, by both the public opinions of his country, for this was one
of the few points on which these antagonist sentiments were perfectly
agreed, he now appeared in just the largest brush I remember to have
seen appended to a monikin! I felt a strong inclination to joke the
rotatory republican on this coquetry; but then I remembered how sweet
any stolen indulgence becomes; and, for the life of me, I could not give
utterance to a bon-mot. The elegance of the minister was rendered the
more conspicuous by the simplicity of the brigadier, who had contrived
to moustache his dock, a very short one at the best, in such a manner as
to render it nearly invisible. On my expressing a doubt to Mr. Downright
about his being admitted in such a costume, he snapped his fingers,
and gave me to understand he knew better. He appeared as a brigadier of
Leaplow (I found afterwards that he was in truth no soldier, but that
it was a fashion among his countrymen to travel under the title of
brigadier), and this was his uniform; and he should like to see the
chamberlain who would presume to call in question the state of his
wardrobe! As it was no affair of mine, I prudently dropped the subject,
and we were soon in the court of the palace.

I shall pass over the parade of guards, the state bands, the
sergeant-trumpeters, the crowd of footmen and pages, and conduct the
reader at once to the