d through my dear Lord and Saviour Jesus Christ, but am at
constant war with myself. I plead thy promise, that thou wilt subdue
my iniquities, that sin shall not have dominion over me. And now,
Captain of salvation, I renew the fight, but it is depending upon thee
to fight for me, with me, and in me. I will set myself to watch, but I
shall watch in vain, if thou keep not the avenues of my heart, and the
door of my lips. O, clothe me with thy meek and lowly spirit."

"SABBATH, July 26, 1812.

"Tired of the bustle of Rockaway, and having some subordinate
motives for returning home for a time, I embraced this season in
particular; having, in the compass of one week, Sabbath, Wednesday my
birthday, and the day set apart both by the General Assembly of our
church and the Governor of our state, for fasting, prayer, and
humiliation, besides lectures on the same evening. I returned
therefore on Friday, the 24th.

"Dr. R---- preached from Psalm 27:1,'The Lord is my light and my
salvation; whom shall I fear? the Lord is the strength of my life; of
whom shall I be afraid?'

"O my God, my merciful and gracious God, what can I say of thy
amazing, distinguishing mercy to me? Delivered from all these fears,
and able to adopt the text fully, I know of none who have more or
greater cause of fear as sinners. My transgressions have been of
_crimson_ and _scarlet_ hue. O my God, thou knowest them,
words cannot paint them. My Saviour, thou knowest them, for thou
baredst them; every jot and tittle was put to thy account, and thou
didst cancel all. O that garden, that cry on the cross! the effects
were seen on thy sacred body, but who can conceive the mysterious
horror which agonized thy sacred soul? But thou saidst, _It is
finished,_ and finished it is. Lamb of God, which takest away the
sins of the world, on thy consecrated head I lay the hand of faith,
confess my sins, pray for forgiveness, and believe that I am forgiven.

"July 29th, my birthday, and the last day of the threescore years
and ten of my sinful life. What an, exhibition will that day produce,
when the secrets of all hearts will be laid open, all my actions and
all the springs of them. In all the myriads which shall appear at the
bar of God, will there be such a sinner--taking into view the early
grace manifested?

"Born, I think, about the seventeenth year of my natural life;
previously instructed in t