lie.

"And what do they say? 'Calcutta keeps me, and China keeps me, and
Bot'ney Bay keeps me, and Canada keeps me, and Nova Scotia keeps me, and
the whales keep me, and the white bears keep me, and every thing on the
airth keeps me, every thing under the airth keeps me. In short, all the
world keeps me.'"

"No, not all the world, Sam," said Mr. Hopewell; "there are some
repudiative States that _don't keep me_; and if you go to the auction
rooms, you'll see some beautiful carriages for sale, that say, 'the
United States' Bank used to keep me,' and some more that say, 'Nick
Biddle put me down.'"

"Minister, I won't stand that," said Mr. Slick. "I won't stay here and
hear you belittle Uncle Sam that way for nothin'. He ain't wuss than
John Bull, arter all. Ain't there no swindle-banks here? Jist tell me
that. Don't our liners fetch over, every trip, fellers that cut and run
from England, with their fobs filled with other men's money? Ain't
there lords in this country that know how to "repudiate" as well as
ring-tail-roarers in ourn. So come now, don't throw stones till you put
your window-shutters to, or you may stand a smart chance of gettin' your
own glass broke, that's a fact.'

"And then, Squire, jist look at the carriages. I'll bet you a goose and
trimmin's you can't find their ditto nowhere. They _are_ carriages, and
no mistake, that's a fact. Look at the hosses, the harness, the paint,
the linin's, the well-dressed, lazy, idle, infarnal hansum servants,
(these rascals, I suspicion, are picked out for their looks), look at
the whole thing all through the piece, take it, by and large, stock,
lock, and barrel, and it's the dandy, that's a fact. Don't it cost
money, that's all? Sumtotalize it then, and see what it all comes to.
It would make your hair stand on eend, I know. If it was all put into
figure, it would reach clean across the river; and if it was all put
into dollars, it would make a solid tire of silver, and hoop the world
round and round, like a wheel.

"If you want to give a man an idea of England, Squire, tell him of
Ascot; and if you want to cram him, get old Multiplication-table Joe H--
to cast it up; for he'll make it come to twice as much as it railly is,
and that will choke him. Yes, Squire, _stick to Ascot_."

CHAPTER IV. THE GANDER PULLING.

A cunning man is generally a suspicious one, and is as often led into
error himself by his own misconceptions, as protected from imposition by