licate joke_.)

_Irate Old Gentleman who overhears the story_. "If he said that, sir, he
ought to have been hissed off the stage, sir; and turned out of the
company, sir! It was an insult to an estimable lady, and an outrage on
the audience, sir!"

_The second act takes place in the salon of ESTELLE. The Colonel and his
Commanding Sister lay siege to_ ESTELLE'S _heart. Graceless Private, in
evening dress, countermines the Colonel's forces and routs them, wading
deeper than before in the exhilarating surf of love, hand in hand with_
ESTELLE. (_This metaphor has been leased for a term of years to a
distinguished hydropathic poet.) Clumsy Trumpeter drops books and things
all over the room, and recognises the Graceless Private. Finally the
Colonel and the latter quarrel, and go out in the back yard to fight,
where the Private is wounded in the arm. The Colonel returns and
announces the result to_ ESTELLE, _who swoons, or at all events, makes
an admirable feint of so doing. Curtain._

_Fast Young Man_. "STODDART didn't try his good joke to-night. He'll say
something yet, though, before the play is over."

_Every body Else_. "Did you ever see better acting than WYNDHAM'S and
Miss MOORE'S? And how capitally FISHER and Miss MESTAYER are playing?
STODDART positively hasn't sworn yet. What can be the matter with him?"

_Inquiring Maiden, to her travelled lover_. "Are the uniforms just like
those of the real French Lancers?"

_Travelled Lover_. "Very nearly. There is one button too many on the
front of the Colonel's coat. I know the regiment well. It's the crack
artillery regiment in the French service."

_Act III. shows us the Graceless Private brought before the Colonel for
examination. He feigns drunkenness, but the Colonel suspects him of
having been his adversary at the ball_. ESTELLE _visits the Colonel in
order to save her Private lover. He is proved to have broken his arrest,
and is sentenced to death_. ESTELLE _offers to marry the Colonel if he
will pardon the Private. The latter's discharge arrives in the nick of
time, and as he is thus beyond the reach of the Colonel's vengeance, he
graciously pardons him, and joins his hand to that of_ ESTELLE. _He
remarks--or ought to--"Bless you, my children." Every body suddenly
finds out that every body else is noble and generous. And so the curtain
falls upon a happy garrison, including a Trumpeter who has not sworn a
single oath_.

_One Half of the Audience_. "How do you