ned that balls were given by
the officers of the ships of war that came occasionally to Leith Roads,
and I was always invited, but never allowed to go; for my mother thought
it foolish to run the risk of crossing the Firth, a distance of seven
miles, at a late hour, in a small open boat and returning in the
morning, as the weather was always uncertain, and the sea often rough
from tide and wind. On one occasion, my father was at home, and, though
it was blowing hard, I thought he would not object to accepting the
invitation; but he said, "Were it a matter of duty, you should go, even
at the risk of your life, but for a ball, certainly not."

We were as poor as ever, even more so; for my father was led into
unavoidable expenses in London; so, after all the excitement, we
returned to our more than usually economical life. No events worth
mentioning happened for a long time. I continued my diversified pursuits
as usual; had they been more concentrated, it would have been better;
but there was no choice; for I had not the means of pursuing any one as
far as I could wish, nor had I any friend to whom I could apply for
direction or information. I was often deeply depressed at spending so
much time to so little purpose.

FOOTNOTES:

[Footnote 5: The late Justice Coltman told us, when he and Lady Coltman
came to see my father and mother at Siena, that he recollected when he
first went the circuit seeing more than twenty people hanged at once at
York, chiefly for horse-stealing and such offences.--EDITOR.]

CHAPTER V.

FIRST MARRIAGE (1804)--WIDOWHOOD--STUDIES--SECOND MARRIAGE.

[Mr. Samuel Greig was a distant relation of the Charters family. His
father, an officer in the British navy, had been sent by our
government, at the request of the Empress Catharine, to organize the
Russian navy. Mr. Greig came to the Firth of Forth on board a
Russian frigate, and was received by the Fairfaxes at Burntisland
with Scotch hospitality, as a cousin. He eventually married my
mother; not, however, until he had obtained the Russian consulship,
and settled permanently in London, for Russia was then governed in
the most arbitrary and tyrannical manner, and was neither a safe nor
a desirable residence, and my grandfather only gave his consent to
the marriage on this condition. My mother says:--]

* * * * *

My cousin, Samuel Greig, commissioner of the Russian navy,