gentlemen,
that Mayflower was the ark that floated the deluge of oppression, and
Plymouth Rock was the Ararat on which it landed.

But let me say that these Forefathers were of no more importance than
the Foremothers. [Applause.] As I understand it, there were eight of
them--that is, four fathers and four mothers--from whom all these
illustrious New Englanders descended. Now I was not born in New England,
though far back my ancestors lived in Connecticut, and then crossed over
to Long Island and there joined the Dutch, and that mixture of Yankee
and Dutch makes royal blood. [Applause.] Neither is perfect without the
other, the Yankee in a man's nature saying "Go ahead!" the Dutch in his
blood saying, "Be prudent while you do go ahead!" Some people do not
understand why Long Island was stretched along parallel with all of the
Connecticut coast. I have no doubt that it was so placed that the Dutch
might watch the Yankees. [Laughter.]

But though not born in New England, in my boyhood I had a New England
schoolmaster, whom I shall never forget. He taught us our A, B, C's.
"What is that?" "I don't know, sir." "That's A" [with a slap]. "What is
that?" "I don't know, sir." [With a slap]--"That is B." [Laughter.] I
tell you, a boy that learned his letters in that way never forgot them;
and if the boy was particularly dull, then this New England schoolmaster
would take him over the knee, and then the boy got his information from
both directions. [Renewed laughter.]

But all these things aside, no one sitting at these tables has higher
admiration for the Pilgrim Fathers than I have--the men who believed in
two great doctrines, which are the foundation of every religion that is
worth anything: namely, the fatherhood of God and the brotherhood of
Man--these men of backbone and endowed with that great and magnificent
attribute of stick-to-it-iveness. Macaulay said that no one ever sneered
at the Puritans who had met them in halls of debate or crossed swords
with them on the field of battle. [Applause.] They are sometimes defamed
for their rigorous Sabbaths, but our danger is in the opposite direction
of no Sabbaths at all. It is said that they destroyed witches. I wish
that they had cleared them all out, for the world is full of witches
yet, and if at all these tables there is a man who has not sometimes
been bewitched, let him hold up his glass of ice-water. [Laughter.] It
is said that these Forefathers carried religion into ev