plenty time to speak hereafter--I shall, I believe, be able
to do this without even allowing the world to _very much_
misinterpret--against pure lying there is no defence, but all up to
that I hope to hinder or render unimportant--as you shall know in time
and place.

I have written myself grave, but write to _me_, dear, dearest, and I
will answer in a lighter mood--even now I can say how it was
yesterday's hurry happened. I called on Milnes--who told me Hanmer had
broken a bone in his leg and was laid up, so I called on him too--on
Moxon, by the way, (his brother telling me strangely cheering news,
from the grimmest of faces, about my books selling and likely to sell
... your wishes, Ba!)--then in Bond Street about some business with
somebody, then on Mrs. Montagu who was out walking all the time, and
home too. I found a letter from Mr. Kenyon, perfectly kind, asking me
to go on Monday to meet friends, and with yours to-day comes another
confirming the choice of the day. How entirely kind he is!

I am very well, much better, indeed--taking that bath with sensibly
good effect, to-night I go to Montagu's again; for shame, having kept
away too long.

And the rest shall answer _yours_--dear! Not 'much to answer?' And
Beethoven, and Painting and--what _is_ the rest and shall be answered!
Bless you, now, my darling--I love you, ever shall love you, ever be
your own.

_E.B.B. to R.B._

Tuesday Evening.
[Post-mark, March 4, 1846.]

Yes, but, dearest, you mistake me, or you mistake yourself. I am sure
I do not over-care for forms--it is not my way to do it--and in this
case ... no. Still you must see that here is a fact as well as a form,
and involving a frightful quantity of social inconvenience (to use the
mildest word) if too hastily entered on. I deny altogether looking
for, or 'seeing' any 'security' in it for myself--it is a mere form
for the heart and the happiness: illusions may pass after as before.
Still the truth is that if they were to pass with you now, you stand
free to act according to the wide-awakeness of your eyes, and to
reform your choice ... see! whereas afterward you could not carry out
such a reformation while I was alive, even if I helped you. All I
could do for you would be to walk away. And you pretend not to see
this broad distinction?--ah. For me I have seen just this and no more,
and have felt averse to forestall, to seem