nd not such grand dames when we are by ourselves.
Although I am not young any more, I am still very fond of play." Her
Majesty would taste first what we had been cooking, and would give us
all to taste. She asked: "Do you not think this food has more flavor
than that prepared by the cooks?" We all said it was fine. So we spent
the long days at the Court having good fun.

I saw Emperor Kwang Hsu every morning, and whenever I had the time he
would always ask some words in English. I was surprised to learn that he
knew quite a bit of spelling, too. I found him extremely interesting. He
had very expressive eyes. He was entirely a different person when he was
alone with us. He would laugh and tease, but as soon as he was in the
presence of Her Majesty he would look serious, and as if he were worried
to death. At times he looked stupid. I was told by a great many people
who were presented to him at the different audiences that he did not
look intelligent, and that he would never talk. I knew better, for I
used to see him every day. I was at the Court long enough to study him,
and found him to be one of the most intelligent men in China. He was a
capital diplomat and had wonderful brains, only he had no opportunities.
Now a great many people have asked me the same question, if our Emperor
Kwang Hsu had any courage or brains. Of course outsiders have no idea
how strict the law is, and the way we have to respect our parents. He
was compelled to give up a great many things on account of the law. I
have had many long talks with him and found him a wise man, with
any amount of patience. His life was not a happy one; ever since his
childhood his health was poor. He told me that he never had studied
literature very much, but it came natural to him. He was a born musician
and could play any instrument without studying. He loved the piano, and
was always after me to teach him. There were several beautiful grand
pianos at the Audience Hall. He had very good taste for foreign music,
too. I taught him some easy waltzes and he kept the time beautifully. I
found him a good companion and a good friend, and he confided in me and
told me his troubles and sorrows. We talked a great deal about western
civilization, and I was surprised to learn he was so well informed in
everything. He used to tell me, time after time, his ambitions for the
welfare of his country. He loved his people and would have done anything
to help them whenever there was fam