and children, in order to
gain their object. And a mother may give up her children whom she
loves dearer than life, may risk ostracism and disgrace, only in order
to be with the object of her love. This shows that love, then, becomes
pathological, because any feeling which so completely masters an
individual that he is willing to sacrifice everything he has in the
world is pathological.

=Infatuation and Being in Love.= While, as said, the feeling of love
does not readily lend itself to dissection, to analysis, still we can
differentiate some phases of it. We can differentiate between "being
in love," "infatuation," and "love." Being in love is, as just
indicated, a pathological, morbid phenomenon. The person who is in
love is not in a normal condition. He can see nothing, he cannot be
argued with, as far as his love is concerned. She is the acme of
perfection, physical, mental, and spiritual; nobody can be compared
with her. And, of course, the man is anxiously eager to marry the
object of his love--unless insuperable obstacles are in the way; for
instance, if the man happens to be married.

Infatuation may be as strong as any "being in love" feeling. But with
this difference. In infatuation the man may know that the object of
infatuation is an unworthy one, he may despise her, he may hate her,
he may pray for her death, he may do his utmost to overcome the
infatuation. In short, infatuation is a feeling, chiefly physical,
which the man can analyze, the unworthiness and absurdity of which he
may acknowledge, but which he is unable to resist or overcome. He
feels himself bewitched; he feels himself caught in a net, he is
anxious to tear asunder the meshes of the net, but is not strong
enough to do it.

And this is a pretty good way to differentiate between being in love
and being infatuated. If in love the man does not want to be free from
his chains; he does not want to cease to love or to be in love. When
infatuated the man often uses his utmost will-power to break his
shackles. Sexual satisfaction is often sufficient to shatter an
infatuation; it is not sufficient to destroy love--it often
strengthens and eternalizes it.

Neither being in love nor infatuation can last "forever"; they are
acute maladies of high tension and relatively short duration.
Infatuation may change into indifference or disgust; "being in love"
may change into indifference, hatred, or into real love--a steady,
durable love.

This will a