separate, distinct varieties of love, but there are separate,
distinct varieties of men. A fine and noble man will love finely and
nobly; a coarse and brutal man will love coarsely and brutally. A man
who is fine and noble may not love at all, but he cannot love coarsely
and selfishly; and a coarse and brutal man can never love nobly and
unselfishly. Which once more means: the difference is not inherent in
the love, but in the lover.

But to say that a man may deeply love a woman and not have any sexual
desire for her is nonsense. A man who loves a woman and does not want
to possess her (to use the ugly ancient verb) does not love her--or
he is completely impotent. Whatever the feeling may be for her--it is
not love. He may abstain from having sex relations with her if the
circumstances are such that sex relations may lead to her unhappiness
and suffering, but to refrain from doing a thing, when reason and
judgment lead us to refrain, does not mean not to want the thing.

=Love at First Sight.= Nothing is more firmly established than the
fact that a person may fall passionately and incurably in love with a
person of the opposite sex at the very first sight, in the twinkling
of an eye, in the literal sense of the word. One glance may be
sufficient. And such a love may exist to the end of life, and may, if
reciprocated, lead to supreme happiness, or if unreciprocated to the
deepest unhappiness.

What it is that causes love at first sight is unknown. Some have
suggested that the beloved object sets in motion or fermentation
certain internal secretions (hormones) in the lover which cannot
become "satisfied" or "neutralized" except by that person; and the
possession of the beloved object becomes a physical necessity. This
explanation really means nothing. It is a hypothesis unsusceptible of
proof. But whatever the cause of love at first sight, it is so
mysterious a phenomenon that it gives the mystics and metaphysicians
some justification for their talk about "electric currents" and
"magnetic forces." These phrases also mean nothing, but are an attempt
at explaining the suddenness and irresistibleness of the attack. So
powerful is the attraction of love at first sight that people have
been known to cross continents and oceans merely to get a glimpse of
the beloved object; and people have been known to sacrifice
_everything_--their career, their material possessions, their social
standing, their honor, and even their wife