t. "and being breakfastless"; cf. Theocr. i. 51. The jester's
humour resembles Pistol's ("Merry Wives," i. 3. 23) "O base
Hungarian wight!"

(28) Or, "How say you, my friends, it would hardly do, methinks, to
shut the door upon him." See Becker, "Charicles," p. 92.

Meanwhile the jester, standing at the door of the apartment where the
feast was spread, addressed the company:

I believe you know, sirs, that being a jester by profession, it is my
business to make jokes. I am all the readier, therefore, to present
myself, feeling convinced it is a better joke to come to dinner thus
unbidden than by solemn invitation.

Be seated, (29) then (replied the host). The company are fully fed on
serious thoughts, you see, if somewhat starved of food for laughter.

(29) Lit. "Pray, find a couch then."

The feast proceeded; and, if only to discharge the duty laid upon him at
a dinner-party, Philippus must try at once to perpetrate a jest. Failing
to stir a smile, poor fellow, he made no secret of his perturbation.
Presently he tried again; and for the second time the joke fell flat.
Whereat he paused abruptly in the middle of the course, and muffling up
his face, fell prostrate on the couch.

Then Callias: What ails you, sirrah? Have you the cramp? the toothache?
what?

To which the other heaving a deep groan: Yes, Callias, an atrocious
ache; since laughter has died out among mankind, my whole estate is
bankrupt. (30) In old days I would be asked to dinner to amuse the
company with jests. (31) Now all is changed, and who will be at pains to
ask me out to dinner any more? I might as well pretend to be immortal
as to be serious. Nor will any one invite me in hopes of reclining at
my board in his turn. Everyone knows so serious a thing as dinner in my
house was never heard of; it's against the rules--the more's the pity.

(30) Cf. "Cyrop." VI. i. 3; Plat. "Laws," 677 C.

(31) Lit. "by the laughter which I stirred in them."

And as he spoke he blew his nose and snuffled, uttering the while so
truly dolorous a moan (32) that everybody fell to soothing him. "They
would all laugh again another day," they said, and so implored him
to have done and eat his dinner; till Critobulus could not stand his
lamentation longer, but broke into a peal of laughter. The welcome sound
sufficed. The sufferer unveiled his face, and thus addressed his inner
self: (33) "Be of good cheer, my soul, there are many battles (34) yet
in