a'n't made her
away?" "Oh fie!" says my Quaker; "how canst thou entertain such a
notion! No, no. Made her away? Amy didn't talk like that; I dare say
thou may'st be easy in that; Amy has nothing of that in her head, I dare
say," says she; and so threw it, as it were, out of my thoughts.

But it would not do; it run in my head continually; night and day I
could think of nothing else; and it fixed such a horror of the fact upon
my spirits, and such a detestation of Amy, who I looked upon as the
murderer, that, as for her, I believe if I could have seen her I should
certainly have sent her to Newgate, or to a worse place, upon
suspicion; indeed, I think I could have killed her with my own hands.

As for the poor girl herself, she was ever before my eyes; I saw her by
night and by day; she haunted my imagination, if she did not haunt the
house; my fancy showed me her in a hundred shapes and postures; sleeping
or waking, she was with me. Sometimes I thought I saw her with her
throat cut; sometimes with her head cut, and her brains knocked out;
other times hanged up upon a beam; another time drowned in the great
pond at Camberwell. And all these appearances were terrifying to the
last degree; and that which was still worse, I could really hear nothing
of her; I sent to the captain's wife in Redriff, and she answered me,
she was gone to her relations in Spitalfields. I sent thither, and they
said she was there about three weeks ago, but that she went out in a
coach with the gentlewoman that used to be so kind to her, but whither
she was gone they knew not, for she had not been there since. I sent
back the messenger for a description of the woman she went out with; and
they described her so perfectly, that I knew it to be Amy, and none but
Amy.

I sent word again that Mrs. Amy, who she went out with, left her in two
or three hours, and that they should search for her, for I had a reason
to fear she was murdered. This frighted them all intolerably. They
believed Amy had carried her to pay her a sum of money, and that
somebody had watched her after her having received it, and had robbed
and murdered her.

I believed nothing of that part; but I believed, as it was, that
whatever was done, Amy had done it; and that, in short, Amy had made her
away; and I believed it the more, because Amy came no more near me, but
confirmed her guilt by her absence.

Upon the whole, I mourned thus for her for above a month; but finding
Amy sti