ancied that there wuz a little tone
of repentance in it. Could I influence him for the right? Could I
frighten him into the right path? I felt I must try, and I sez in a
low, deep voice:

"I'll help you to set if you'll set where I want you to."

"Oh, tell me! tell me," sez he, "where you want me to set."

"Not in the high halls where justice is administered, not up there
with the pictures of your numerous wives on your heart to make laws
condemnin' a man who has only one extra wife to prison for twenty
years, which same law would condemn you to prison for 'most a century.
That wouldn't be reasonable. Presidents and senators are sot up there
in Washington D. C. as examplers for the young to foller and stimulate
'em to go and do likewise. Such a example as yourn would stimulate 'em
too much in matrimonial directions and land 'em in prison."

He muttered sunthin' about lots of public men havin' other wives in
secret.

"In secret?" sez I. "Well, mebby so, but it has to be in secret, hid
away, wropped in disgrace, and if the law discovers it they are
punished. That's a very different thing from makin' such a life
respectable, coverin' 'em under the mantilly of the law, embroidered
too with public honors."

He turned away despairin'ly and murmured mekanically the old
heart-broken wail, "I want to set."

And I sez reasonably, "There is no objection to your settin' down, and
if I had my way you would set right by them who have done only half or
a quarter what you have and in the place the laws have made for them
and you."

He turned quick as a wink, "Then you won't help me?"

"Yes," sez I, "I'll help all I can to put you right in with the others
that have done jest what you have--openly set our laws at defiance.
But if I know myself I won't help a tiger cat to hold a canary bird or
a wolf to guard a sheep pen. I won't help a felon up on the seat of
justice to make laws for innocent men."

"Innocent men!" And agin he sez, "Ha! ha!"

And agin I didn't care what he said. And I got up and sez, "You may as
well leave the presence." And as he turned I sez in conclusion,
thinkin' mebby I'd been too hash, "I dare say you have intellect and
may be a good man so fur as I know only in this one iniquity and open
defiance of our laws, and I advise you to turn right round in your
tracks and git ready to set down on high, for you'll find it a much
worse thing to prance round through all eternity without settin' than
it is to n