e time that they
took all power of thinking from me--my fears, which probably would not
have suffered me to know what course to take, had I not had him to urge
and draw me after him: especially as I beheld a man, who must have come
out of the door, keeping us in his eye, running now towards us; then
back to the garden; beckoning and calling to others, whom I supposed he
saw, although the turning of the wall hindered me from seeing them; and
whom I imagined to be my brother, my father, and their servants.

Thus terrified, I was got out of sight of the door in a very few
minutes: and then, although quite breathless between running and
apprehension, he put my arm under his, his drawn sword in the other
hand, and hurried me on still faster: my voice, however, contradicting
my action; crying, no, no, no, all the while; straining my neck to look
back, as long as the walls of the garden and park were within sight,
and till he brought me to the chariot: where, attending, were two armed
servants of his own, and two of Lord M.'s on horseback.

Here I must suspend my relation for a while: for now I am come to this
sad period of it, my indiscretion stares me in the face; and my shame
and my grief give me a compunction that is more poignant methinks than
if I had a dagger in my heart. To have it to reflect, that I should
so inconsiderately give in to an interview, which, had I known either
myself or him, or in the least considered the circumstances of the case,
I might have supposed would put me into the power of his resolution, and
out of that of my own reason.

For, might I not have believed, that he, who thought he had cause to
apprehend that he was on the point of losing a person who had cost
him so much pains and trouble, would not hinder her, if possible, from
returning? That he, who knew I had promised to give him up for ever, if
insisted as a condition of reconciliation, would not endeavour to put it
out of my power to do so? In short, that he, who had artfully forborne
to send for my letter, (for he could not be watched, my dear,) lest he
should find in it a countermand to my appointment, (as I myself could
apprehend, although I profited by the apprehension,) would want a device
to keep me with him till the danger of having our meeting discovered
might throw me absolutely into his power, to avoid my own worse usage,
and the mischiefs which might have ensued (perhaps in my very sight) had
my friends and he met?

But if i