Letter to Miss Howe, No. IX., her own sense upon
the subject.

'And have you not furthermore declared,' proceeded he 'that you will
engage to renounce me for ever, if you friends insist upon that cruel
renunciation, as the terms of being reconciled to you?

'But nevertheless, Madam, all the merit of having saved you from an
odious compulsion, shall be mine. I glory in it, though I were to lose
you for ever. As I see I am but too likely to do, from your present
displeasure; and especially, if your friends insist upon the terms you
are ready to comply with.

'That you are your own mistress, through my means, is, I repeat, my
boast. As such, I humbly implore your favour, and that only upon the
conditions I have yielded to hope for it. As I do now, thus humbly,
[the proud wretch falling on one knee,] your forgiveness, for so long
detaining your ear, and for all the plain dealing that my undesigning
heart would not be denied to utter by my lips.'

O Sir, pray rise! Let the obliged kneel, if one of us must kneel! But,
nevertheless, proceed not in this strain, I beseech you. You have had
a great deal of trouble about me: but had you let me know in time, that
you expected to be rewarded for it at the price of my duty, I should
have spared you much of it.

Far be it from me, Sir, to depreciate merit so extraordinary. But let me
say, that had it not been for the forbidden correspondence I was teased
by you into; and which I had not continued (every letter, for many
letters, intended to be the last) but because I thought you a sufferer
from my friends; I had not been either confined or ill treated: nor
would my brother's low-meant violence have had a foundation to work
upon.

I am far from thinking my case would have been so very desperate as you
imagine had I staid. My father loved me in his heart: he would not see
me before; and I wanted only to see him, and to be heard; and a delay
of his sentence was the least thing I expected from the trial I was to
stand.

You are boasting of your merits, Sir: let merit be your boast; nothing
else can attract me. If personal considerations had principal weight
with me, either in Solmes's disfavour, or in your favour, I shall
despise myself: if you value yourself upon them, in preference to the
person of the poor Solmes, I shall despise you!

You may glory in your fancied merits in getting me away: but the cause
of your glory, I tell you plainly, is my shame.

Make to yourself