t, Sam; go and talk to a Consarvative as
a Tory, and you will find he is a Whig: go and talk to him again as a
Whig, and you will find he is a Tory. They are, for all the world, like
a sturgeon. There is very good beef steaks in a sturgeon, and very good
fish too, and yet it tante either fish or flesh. I don't like taking
a new name, it looks amazing like taking new principles, or, at all
events, like loosenin' old ones, and I hante seen the creed of this new
sect yet--I don't know what its tenets are, nor where to go and look for
'em. It strikes me they don't accord with the Tories, and yet arn't in
tune with the Whigs, but are half a note lower than the one, and half
a note higher than t'other. Now, changes in the body politic are always
necessary more or less, in order to meet the changes of time, and the
changes in the condition of man. When they are necessary, make 'em, and
ha' done with 'em. Make 'em like men, not when you are forced to do so,
and nobody thanks you, but when you see they are wanted, and are proper;
but don't alter your name.

"My wardens wanted me to do that; they came to me, and said 'Minister,'
says they, 'we don't want _you_ to change, we don't ask it; jist let
us call you a Unitarian, and you can remain Episcopalian still. We are
tired of that old fashioned name, it's generally thought unsuited to
the times, and behind the enlightment of the age; it's only fit for
benighted Europeans. Change the name, you needn't change any thing else.
What is a name?'

"'Every thing,' says I, 'every thing, my brethren; one name belongs to a
Christian, and the other don't; that's the difference. I'd die before
I surrendered my name; for in surrenderin' that, I surrender my
principles.'"

"Exactly," said Mr. Slick, "that's what Brother Eldad used to say.
'Sam,' said he, 'a man with an _alias_ is the worst character in the
world; for takin' a new name, shows he is ashamed of his old one; and
havin' an old one, shows his new one is a cheat.'"

"No," said Mr. Hopewell, "I don't like that word Consarvative. Them
folks may be good kind of people, and I guess they be, seein' that the
Tories support 'em, which is the best thing I see about them; but I
don't like changin' a name."

"Well, I don't know," said Mr. Slick, "p'raps their old name was so
infarnal dry rotted, they wanted to change it for a sound new one. You
recollect when that super-superior villain, Expected Thorne, brought
an action of defamation agi