ve already
related. He there met Xavier, and was so charmed with his manner of life,
that he had thoughts of becoming his disciple. But, besides that the
labours which are inseparable from the ministry apostolical somewhat
shocked him, he judged, that he ought to undertake nothing but by the
counsel of the bishop of the Indies; insomuch, that he left Amboyna
without forming any resolution, and even without opening himself to
Father Xavier.

When the Spanish fleet was arrived at Goa, he presented himself to the
bishop, who, being in want of spiritual substitutes, gave him one of the
chief vicariats of his diocese. Torrez was of opinion, that God required
nothing farther of him; and for the space of four or five months,
performed all the functions of that office, which the bishop had given
him in charge. But the continual disquiets of his soul rendered him
suspicious of his own condition, and brought him to believe, that God had
punished him, for not following the new apostle of the East.

Being one day much troubled in his mind, he went to the college of St
Paul, and opened himself to Father Lancilotti, desiring him to unfold to
him the nature of that institute, with which he was so much taken, by
seeing Father Xavier at Amboyna. As some interior motions had of late
pushed him on to the performance of somewhat that was great, and of
suffering all things for the glory of Jesus Christ, he found the
institute of Ignatius so conformable to the present dispositions of his
soul, that, without farther balancing the matter, he was resolved to go
through the spiritual exercises, to fit himself for the change of his
condition. From the second day, he received such light, and so much
comfort from above, that he believed himself in heaven already. He could
not sufficiently admire, that those plain and easy truths, which he had
often read without any taste of them, should make such lively impressions
in him, as now they did. And he discovered this to Lancilotti, with
expressions full of astonishment. Nevertheless, being affrighted at the
prospect of a perpetual engagement, and perhaps tempted by the devil, he
could not settle to it, and was every day more and more irresolute.

Xavier arrived just at that point of time. He had scarcely seen Torrez,
when behold a man, fixed on the sudden, and resolved, and pressing to be
received amongst the children of Ignatius. The apostle received him, and
took pains himself to form him, according