Company was complaining of the bad
Situation her Husband's Affairs would have been in, if that it had not
pleased G--d the _Apricots, Plumbs and Nectarins had turned out vastly
bad and plentiful this Year_.

Sometimes when the Mischiefs arising from unwholesome Fruits are too
apparent, and a general Outcry is raised by Nurses and Old Women
against People's indulging themselves too freely in them; then Care is
taken to conceal the _Poison_ under little kind of _Crusts_ in the
nature of _Pyes_ and _Tarts_: and besides what are sold in great
Shops, itinerant Pastry-Cooks are dispersed all over the City and
Suburbs to tempt liquorish Women and Children to become the Properties
of an Apothecary's Shop.

Many there are, who would be inclined to think it something romantick,
when I venture to assure them, that above an hundred Families in and
about this City and Suburbs are actually supported and maintain'd by
no other Means than those of _stealing Dogs_ from the Doors and Houses
of Persons of Quality and Condition; and that Children are actually
put forth Apprentice for a certain Term of Years, and have Money given
with them, to be instructed in this _Art and Mystery_.

We see, that when some of these _innocent Animals_ are missing, what a
Value is set upon them, by the round Sums offer'd by publick
Advertisement. How many great Ladies are there, that would sooner be
reconcil'd to the death of a Child, or a near Relation, than to that
of a favourite Lap-Dog? And how often have we seen Families in deep
Mourning on these _sad Occasions_? From Air to Air, and from Mineral
to Mineral, have they been shifted upon the slightest Disorder. I have
known a tip-top Physician sent for by an Express, and several Sets of
Horses laid on the Road for him, to go with the utmost Expedition to
visit a Lap-Dog that has been only ill of a sullen Fit, or so, in
_Yorkshire_. A Woman of the first Quality, who, when all other
Remedies fail'd her, found great Benefit by Walking, was obliged to
give over that beneficial Exercise, for no other reason, forsooth, but
that her favourite Dog could not keep pace with her, and what was
found to be advantageous to her Constitution, was detrimental to his.

The _Artificers_ who make a _Livelihood_ by decoying these _pretty
Puppets_ away, for the sake of the _Guineas_ and _Half Guineas_ that
are usually given for their recovery to the Owners, are fond to pay a
close and diligent Attendance near the Doors of