, THEY WILL COME AND FETCH US AT SIX THIS
EVENING." Well, as this was the last day, I went and got the best goose
I could find (I don't think I ever saw a primer, or ate more hearty
myself), and had it roasted at three, with a good pudding afterwards;
and a glorious bowl of punch. "Here's a health to you, dear girls," says
I, "and you, Ma, and good luck to all three; and as you've not eaten a
morsel, I hope you won't object to a glass of punch. It's the old stuff,
you know, Ma'am, that that Waters sent to my father fifteen years ago."

Six o'clock came, and with it came a fine barouche. As I live, Captain
Waters was on the box (it was his coach); that old thief, Bates, jumped
out, entered my house, and before I could say Jack Robinson, whipped off
mamma to the carriage: the girls followed, just giving me a hasty shake
of the hand; and as mamma was helped in, Mary Waters, who was sitting
inside, flung her arms round her, and then round the girls; and the
Doctor, who acted footman, jumped on the box, and off they went; taking
no more notice of ME than if I'd been a nonentity.

Here's a picture of the whole business:--Mamma and Miss Waters are
sitting kissing each other in the carriage, with the two girls in the
back seat: Waters is driving (a precious bad driver he is too); and I'm
standing at the garden door, and whistling. That old fool Mary Malowney
is crying behind the garden gate: she went off next day along with the
furniture; and I to get into that precious scrape which I shall mention
next.

SEPTEMBER.--PLUCKING A GOOSE.

After my papa's death, as he left me no money, and only a little land,
I put my estate into an auctioneer's hands, and determined to amuse
my solitude with a trip to some of our fashionable watering-places. My
house was now a desert to me. I need not say how the departure of my
dear parent, and her children, left me sad and lonely.

Well, I had a little ready money, and, for the estate, expected a couple
of thousand pounds. I had a good military-looking person: for though I
had absolutely cut the old North Bungays (indeed, after my affair with
Waters, Colonel Craw hinted to me, in the most friendly manner, that
I had better resign)--though I had left the army, I still retained the
rank of Captain; knowing the advantages attendant upon that title in a
watering-place tour.

Captain Stubbs became a great dandy at Cheltenham, Harrogate, Bath,
Leamington, and other places. I was a good whi