ost all women of fashion smoke nowadays," I resumed. "The Empress
of the French smokes this sort of thing here; and the Queen of Bavaria
smokes and chews."

She seemed rebuked at this, and said nothing.

"As for myself," said I, "I am nothing without tobacco,--positively
nothing. I remember one night,--it was the fourth sitting of the
Congress at Paris, that Sardinian fellow, you know his name, came to me
and said,--

"'There's that confounded question of the Danubian Provinces coming on
to-morrow, and Gortschakoff is the only one who knows anything about it.
Where are we to get at anything like information?'

"'When do you want it, Count?' said I.

"'To-morrow, by eleven at latest There must be, at least, a couple of
hours to study it before the Congress meets.'

"'Tell them to bring in ten candles, fifty cigars, and two quires of
foolscap,' said I, 'and let no one pass this door till I ring.' At ten
minutes to eleven next morning he had in his hands that memoir which
Lord C. said embodied the prophetic wisdom of Edmund Burke with the
practical statesmanship of the great Commoner. Perhaps you have read
it?"

"No, sir."

"Your tastes do not probably incline to affairs of state. If so, only
suggest what you 'd like to talk on. I am indifferently skilled in most
subjects. Are you for the poets? I am ready, from Dante to the Biglow
Papers. Shall it be arts? I know the whole thing from Memmling and his
long-nosed saints, to Leech and the Punctuate. Make it antiquities,
agriculture, trade, dress, the drama, conchology, or cock-fighting,--
I'm your man; so go in; and don't be afraid that you 'll disconcert me."

"I assure you, sir, that my fears would attach far more naturally to my
own insufficiency."

"Well," said I, after a pause, "there's something in that Macaulay used
to be afraid of me. Whenever Mrs. Montagu Stanhope asked him to one
of her Wednesday dinners, he always declined if I was to be there. You
don't seem surprised at that?"

"No, sir," said she, in the same quiet, grave fashion.

"What's the reason, young lady," said I, somewhat sternly, "that you
persist in saying 'sir' on every occasion that you address me? The ease
of that intercourse that should subsist between us is marred by this
Americanism. The pleasant interchange of thought loses the charming
feature of equality. How is this?"

"I am not at liberty to say, sir."

"You are not at liberty to say, young lady?" said I, severely. "You