re in her hair;
She winks and giggles and simpers,
And simpers and giggles and winks;
And though she talks but little,
'Tis a good deal more than she thinks.

She lies abed in the morning
Till nearly the hour of noon,
Then comes down snapping and snarling
Because she was called so soon;
Her hair is still in papers,
Her cheeks still fresh with paint,--
Remains of her last night's blushes,
Before she intended to faint.

She dotes upon men unshaven,
And men with "flowing hair;"
She's eloquent over mustaches,
They give such a foreign air.
She talks of Italian music,
And falls in love with the moon;
And, if a mouse were to meet her,
She would sink away in a swoon.

Her feet are so very little,
Her hands are so very white,
Her jewels so very heavy,
And her head so very light;
Her color is made of cosmetics
(Though this she will never own),
Her body is made mostly of cotton,
Her heart is made wholly of stone.

She falls in love with a fellow
Who swells with a foreign air;
He marries her for her money,
She marries him for his hair!
One of the very best matches,--
Both are well mated in life;
_She's got a fool for a husband,
He's got a fool for a wife_!

WIDOW MACHREE

_By_ SAMUEL LOVER

Widow machree, it's no wonder you frown,--
Och hone! widow machree;
Faith, it ruins your looks, that same dirty black gown,--
Och hone! widow machree.
How altered your air,
With that close cap you wear,--
'Tis destroying your hair,
Which should be flowing free;
Be no longer a churl
Of its black silken curl,--
Och hone! widow machree!

Widow machree, now the summer is come,--
Och hone! widow machree,
When everything smiles, should a beauty look glum?
Och hone! widow machree!
See the birds go in pairs,
And the rabbits and hares;
Why, even the bears
Now in couples agree;
And the mute little fish,
Though they can't spake, they wish,--
Och hone! widow machree.

[Illustration: FAITH, I WISH YOU'D TAKE ME!]

Widow machree, and when winter comes in,--
Och hone! widow machree,--
To be poking the fire all alone is a sin,
Och hone! widow machree.
Sure the shovel and