of the
Italian singers."

"Madam," said I, "the affliction you complain of, is to be redressed by
law; but at the same time, consider what mortifications you are to go
through in bringing it into open court; how you will be able to bear the
impertinent whispers of the people present at the trial, the licentious
reflections of the pleaders, and the interpretations that will in
general be put upon your conduct by all the world: 'How little,' will
they say, 'could that lady command her passions.' Besides, consider,
that curbing our desires is the greatest glory we can arrive at in this
world, and will be most rewarded in the next." She answered, like a
prudent matron, "Sir, if you please to remember the office of matrimony,
the first cause of its institution is that of having posterity:
therefore, as to the curbing desires, I am willing to undergo any
abstinence from food as you please to enjoin me; but I cannot, with any
quiet of mind, live in the neglect of a necessary duty, and an express
commandment, Increase and multiply." Observing she was learned, and
knew so well the duties of life, I turned my arguments rather to dehort
her from this public procedure by examples, than precepts. "Do but
consider, madam, what crowds of beauteous women live in nunneries,
secluded for ever from the sight and conversation of men, with all the
alacrity of spirit imaginable; they spend their time in heavenly
raptures, in constant and frequent devotions, and at proper hours in
agreeable conversations." "Sir," said she hastily, "tell not me of
Papists, or any of their idolatries." "Well then, madam, consider how
many fine ladies live innocently in the eye of the world, and this gay
town, in the midst of temptation: there's the witty Mrs. W---- is a
virgin of 44, Mrs. T----s is 39, Mrs. L----ce, 33; yet you see, they
laugh and are gay, at the park, at the playhouse, at balls, and at
visits; and so much at ease, that all this seems hardly a self-denial."
"Mr. Bickerstaff," said she, with some emotion, "you are an excellent
casuist; but the last word destroyed your whole argument; if it is not
self-denial, it is no virtue. I presented you with a half-guinea, in
hopes not only to have my conscience eased, but my fortune told. Yet--"
"Well, madam," said I, "pray of what age is your husband?" "He is,"
replied my injured client, "fifty, and I have been his wife fifteen
years." "How happened it, you never communicated your distress in all
this ti