of Jacobstaff: his younger brother
Isaacstaff, as I told you before, had five sons, and was married twice;
his first wife was a Staff (for they did not stand upon false heraldry
in those days), by whom he had one son, who in process of time, being a
schoolmaster, and well read in the Greek, called himself Distaff or
Twicestaff: he was not very rich, so he put his children out to trades;
and the Distaffs have ever since been employed in the woollen and linen
manufactures, except myself, who am a genealogist. Pikestaff, the eldest
son by the second venter, was a man of business, a downright plodding
fellow, and withal so plain, that he became a proverb. Most of this
family are at present in the army. Raggedstaff was an unlucky boy, and
used to tear his clothes getting birds' nests, and was always playing
with a tame bear his father kept. Mopstaff fell in love with one of his
father's maids, and used to help her to clean the house. Broomstaff was
a chimney-sweeper. The Mopstaffs and Broomstaffs are naturally as civil
people as ever went out of doors; but alas! if they once get into ill
hands, they knock down all before them. Pilgrimstaff run away from his
friends, and went strolling about the country: and Pipestaff was a
wine-cooper. These two were the unlawful issue of Longstaff.

"N.B. The Canes, the Clubs, the Cudgels, the Wands, the Devil upon two
Sticks, and one Bread, that goes by the name of Staff of Life, are none
of our relations.

"I am, dear Cousin,

"Your humble Servant,

"D. DISTAFF.

"From the Heralds' Office, _May 1_."

St. James's Coffee-house, May 4.

As politic news is not the principal subject on which we treat, we are
so happy as to have no occasion for that art of cookery, which our
brother-newsmongers so much excel in; as appears by their excellent and
inimitable manner of dressing up a second time for your taste the same
dish which they gave you the day before, in case there come over no new
pickles from Holland. Therefore, when we have nothing to say to you from
courts and camps, we hope still to give you somewhat new and curious
from ourselves: the women of our house, upon occasion, being capable of
carrying on the business, according to the laudable custom of the wives
in Holland; but, without further preface, take what we have not
mentioned in our former relations.

Letters from Hanover of the 30th of the last month say, that the Prince
Royal of