ng! (to Lord Mountararat). My own!
(to Lord Tolloller). Well, have you settled which it's to be?
LORD TOLL. Not altogether. It's a difficult position. It
would be hardly delicate to toss up. On the whole we would rather
leave it to you.
PHYL. How can it possibly concern me? You are both EarIs,
and you are both rich, and you are both plain.
LORD MOUNT. So we are. At least I am.
LORD TOLL. So am I.
LORD MOUNT. No, no!
LORD TOLL. I am indeed. Very plain.
LORD MOUNT. Well, well--perhaps you are.
PHYL. There's really nothing to choose between you. If one
of you would forgo his title, and distribute his estates among his
Irish tenantry, why, then, I should then see a reason for accepting
the other.
LORD MOUNT. Tolloller, are you prepared to make this
sacrifice?
LORD TOLL. No!
LORD MOUNT. Not even to oblige a lady?
LORD TOLL. No! not even to oblige a lady.
LORD MOUNT. Then, the only question is, which of us shall
give way to the other? Perhaps, on the whole, she would be happier
with me. I don't know. I may be wrong.
LORD TOLL. No. I don't know that you are. I really believe
she would. But the awkward part of the thing is that if you rob me
of the girl of my heart, we must fight, and one of us must die.
It's a family tradition that I have sworn to respect. It's a
painful position, for I have a very strong regard for you, George.
LORD MOUNT. (much affected). My dear Thomas!
LORD TOLL. You are very dear to me, George. We were boys
together--at least I was. If I were to survive you, my existence
would be hopelessly embittered.
LORD MOUNT. Then, my dear Thomas, you must not do it. I say
it again and again--if it will have this effect upon you, you must
not do it. No, no. If one of us is to destroy the other, let it
be me!
LORD TOLL. No, no!
LORD MOUNT. Ah, yes!--by our boyish friendship I implore you!
LORD TOLL. (much moved). Well, well, be it so. But,
no--no!--I cannot consent to an act which would crush you with
unavaillng remorse.
LORD MOUNT. But it would not do so. I should be very sad at
first--oh, who would not be?--but it would wear off. I like you
very much--but not, perhaps, as much as you like me.
LORD TOLL. George, you're a noble fellow, but that tell-tale
tear betra