lord high treasurer wanted to fine me 12,000 tomauns; the king
did not allow it--there are 12,000 more. Then the rest is made up of
what I have subsisted upon ever since I have been in the Shah's service,
and so my sum is made out." And then I took to my exclamations of "May
the king live for ever!--may his shadow never be less!--may he conquer
all his enemies!"--all of which I flattered myself was duly reported to
his majesty: and some days after I was invested with a dress of honour,
consisting of a brocade coat, a shawl for the waist, and one for the
head, and a brocade cloak trimmed with fur. I was also honoured with the
title of Prince of Poets, by virtue of a royal firman, which, according
to the usual custom, I wore in my cap for three successive days,
receiving the congratulations of my friends, and feeling of greater
consequence than I had ever done before. I wrote a poem, which answered
the double purpose of gratifying my revenge for the ill-treatment I
had received from the lord high treasurer, and of conciliating his
good graces; for it had a double meaning all through: what he in his
ignorance mistook for praise, was in fact satire; and as he thought
that the high-sounding words in which it abounded (which, being mostly
Arabic, he did not understand) must contain an eulogium, he did not
in the least suspect that they were in fact expressions containing
the grossest disrespect. In truth, I had so cloaked my meaning, that,
without my explanation, it would have been difficult for any one to have
discovered it. But it was not alone in poetry that I excelled. I had a
great turn for mechanics, and several of my inventions were much admired
at court. I contrived a wheel for perpetual motion, which only wants one
little addition to make it go round for ever. I made different sorts of
coloured paper; I invented a new sort of ink-stand; and was on the high
road to making cloth, when I was stopped by his majesty, who said to me,
"Asker, stick to your poetry: whenever I want cloth, my merchants bring
it from Europe." And I obeyed his instructions; for on the approaching
festival of the new year's day, when it is customary for each of his
servants to make him a present, I wrote something so happy about a
toothpick, I which I presented in a handsome case, that the principal
nobleman of the court, at the great public audience of that sacred
day, were ordered to kiss me on the mouth for my pains. I compared his
majesty's tee