iews" with me which I had never accorded,
containing most amazing particulars about my methods and habits.
Occasionally a reporter was turned on to describe a game when he knew
nothing about golf, and then the results were sometimes amusing. One of
these writers had it that I "carried away the green with my drive."
Another said I "dropped dead at the hole." When playing at Washington
against two opponents, I happened to beat bogey at the first hole. One
of the reporters was told of this achievement, but did not quite
understand it. Going to the next hole, we were walking through a bunker
when he came up to me and politely inquired if that--the bunker--was the
kind of bogey that I had beaten. I was told a very good story of
American golf reporting. A match was arranged between two well-known
amateurs, one of whom happened to be a very rich banker. One reporter,
who admitted that he "knew nothing about the darned game," arrived
rather late on the course, and borrowed the "copy" of an experienced
golfing journalist for information of what had already happened. When
this "copy" was duly returned with thanks, the late-comer remarked to
his obliging friend, "Say, you made a bad mistake in one part." "What
was it?" the other asked. "Waal, you say that So-and-so 'lipped the hole
for a half.'" "Yes, that is right." "Oh, go away; you don't mean to tell
me that a rich man like that would be playing for a paltry fifty cents.
I've altered it to 'lipped the hole for a hundred dollars.'" And I
remember that once when I was playing the best ball of two amateurs, one
of the reporters had been instructed by his chief to keep the best ball
score. I happened to lose the match on the last green, but on looking
through the paper the next morning I was surprised to see it stated that
I was beaten by not one but many holes, making this defeat in fact the
biggest inflicted on me during my tour. The paper said that it was. I
could not make anything out of it for some time, until at last I
discovered that the reporter had reckoned my score also in the best ball
figures! Obviously I could not beat myself. The best I could do was to
get a half, and that was how it came about that I never won a single
hole in the "Harry Vardon _v._ Harry Vardon and two others" match.

CHAPTER XXII

CONCERNING CADDIES

Varieties of caddies--Advice to a left-handed player--Cock-shots at
Ganton--Unearned increments--An offer to carry for the fun of th