a glittering mass of magnificent
gems. The rapidity of her motions was only equalled by the swift and
surprising monologue that poured from her mouth.

"There, that odious king gets in my way," she said. "So like a man to
poke himself in where he isn't wanted. _Bacco!_ No, not that: I have a
cigarette. I hear all you ladies are terrific bridge-players: we will
have a game presently, and I shall sink into the earth with terror at
your Camorra! _Dio!_ there's another king, and that's his own queen whom
he doesn't want at all. He is _amoroso_ for that black queen, who is
quite covered up, and he would like to be covered up with her. Susan, my
dear" (that was interesting, but they all knew it already), "kindly
ring the bell for coffee. I expire if I do not get my coffee at once,
and a toothpick. Tell me all the scandal of Tilling, Miss Mapp, while I
play--all the dreadful histories of that Major and that Captain. Such a
grand air has the Captain--no, it is the Major, the one who does not
limp. Which of all you ladies do they love most? It is Miss Mapp, I
believe: that is why she does not answer me. Ah! here is the coffee, and
the other king: three lumps of sugar, dear Susan, and then stir it up
well, and hold it to my mouth, so that I can drink without interruption.
Ah, the ace! He is the intervener, or is it the King's Proctor? It would
be nice to have a proctor who told you all the love-affairs that were
going on. Susan, you must get me a proctor: you shall be my proctor. And
here are the men--the wretches, they have been preferring wine to women,
and we will have our bridge, and if anybody scolds me, I shall cry, Miss
Mapp, and Captain Flint will hold my hand and comfort me."

She gathered up a heap of cards and rings, dropped them on the floor,
and cut with the remainder.

Miss Mapp was very lenient with the Contessa, who was her partner, and
pointed out the mistakes of her and their adversaries with the most
winning smile and eagerness to explain things clearly. Then she revoked
heavily herself, and the Contessa, so far from being angry with her,
burst into peals of unquenchable merriment. This way of taking a revoke
was new to Tilling, for the right thing was for the revoker's partner to
sulk and be sarcastic for at least twenty minutes after. The Contessa's
laughter continued to spurt out at intervals during the rest of the
rubber, and it was all very pleasant; but at the end she said she was
not up to Tilling stan