are not stirring; at two, the room is full of
different acquaintances, who talk over the occurrences of the last
night's ball, and, of course, are paid more attention to than yourself;
at three, they are out shopping; at four, they are in this place dashing
among the Pinks, from which they do not return till seven, then they are
dressing; at eight, they are dining with two dozen friends; at nine and
ten the same; at eleven, they are dressing for the ball; and at twelve,
when you are retiring to rest, they are gone into society for the
evening: so that you are left in solitude; you soon begin again to try
the world--and we will endeavour to discover what it produces.

"The first inconvenience of a London Life is the late ~179~~hour of a
fashionable dinner. To pass the day in fasting, and then sit down to a
great dinner at eight o'clock, is entirely against the first dictates of
common sense and common stomachs. But what is to be done? he who rails
against the fashion of the times will be considered a most unfashionable
dog, and perhaps I have already said more than sufficient to entitle me
to that appellation."

"Don't turn _King's Evidence_ against yourself," said Tom; "for, if you
plead guilty in this happy country, you must be tried by your Peers."

"Nay," said Mortimer, "while fashion and reason appear to be in such
direct opposition to each other, I must confess their merits deserve
to be impartially tried; though I cannot, for one moment, doubt but the
latter must ultimately prevail with the generality, however her dictates
may be disregarded by the votaries of the former."

"You are a good one at a ramble" said Tom, "and not a bad one in a
spree, but I cannot help thinking you are rambling out of your road;
you seem to have lost the thread of your subject, and, having been
disappointed with love and friendship, you are just going to sit down to
dinner."

"Pardon me," replied Sparkle, "I was proceeding naturally, and not
fashionably, to my subject; but I know you are so great an admirer of
the latter, that you care but little about the former."

"Hit for hit," said Tom; "but go on--you are certainly growing old,
Sparkle; at all events, you appear very grave this morning, and if
you continue in this humour long, I shall expect you are about taking
Orders."

"There is a time for all things, but the time for that has not yet
arrived."

"Well, then, proceed without sermonizing."

"I don't like to be interru