but observe also, and leave it for the direction of my sex in
such cases of pleasure, that whenever sincere repentance succeeds such
a crime as this, there never fails to attend a hatred of the object;
and the more the affection might seem to be before, the hatred will be
the more in proportion. It will always be so, indeed it can be no
otherwise; for there cannot be a true and sincere abhorrence of the
offence, and the love to the cause of it remain; there will, with an
abhorrence of the sin, be found a detestation of the fellow-sinner; you
can expect no other.

I found it so here, though good manners and justice in this gentleman
kept him from carrying it on to any extreme but the short history of
his part in this affair was thus: he perceived by my last letter, and
by all the rest, which he went for after, that I was not gone to Bath,
that his first letter had not come to my hand; upon which he write me
this following:--

'MADAM,--I am surprised that my letter, dated the 8th of last month,
did not come to your hand; I give you my word it was delivered at your
lodgings, and to the hands of your maid.

'I need not acquaint you with what has been my condition for some time
past; and how, having been at the edge of the grave, I am, by the
unexpected and undeserved mercy of Heaven, restored again. In the
condition I have been in, it cannot be strange to you that our unhappy
correspondence had not been the least of the burthens which lay upon my
conscience. I need say no more; those things that must be repented of,
must be also reformed.

I wish you would think of going back to the Bath. I enclose you here a
bill for #50 for clearing yourself at your lodgings, and carrying you
down, and hope it will be no surprise to you to add, that on this
account only, and not for any offence given me on your side, I can see
you no more. I will take due care of the child; leave him where he is,
or take him with you, as you please. I wish you the like reflections,
and that they may be to your advantage.--I am,' etc.

I was struck with this letter as with a thousand wounds, such as I
cannot describe; the reproaches of my own conscience were such as I
cannot express, for I was not blind to my own crime; and I reflected
that I might with less offence have continued with my brother, and
lived with him as a wife, since there was no crime in our marriage on
that score, neither of us knowing it.

But I never once reflected th