," I sez, (wi' the chopper behind ma
back)
But I looked sa straaenge an callow, she knawed I wur meanin' 'er ill,
An' she kep a sidlin' an' edgin' awaaey, an' a gaaepin' wi' hopen bill!
Then I maaede a grab at her sooden--an' she skirtled off to a feaeld,
Wheer Squire had been diggin' fur fireclaaey--eh, but she yellocked
an' beaeled!
Cloppity-joggle I chaaesed her, sa well as I cud, bein' laaeme,
An' flippity-flopper she kep' on ahead--an' a' squawked out "Shaaeme!"
(_The Amateur Reciter should find little difficulty here in suggesting
something of the intonation of a frightened goose: Pause--then
continue apologetically._)
I wur haaef asheaemed o' mysen' I wur, afoor I coom to the hend,
(_Remorsefully._) "Ye owd ongreaetful guzzard," I thowt, "to gaw killin'
ya hoaenly friend!"
But ma friend wur a Michaelmas denner tew as I hedn't naw art to refuse!
(_More remorsefully._) An' it maaede me seeae what a gowk I'd beeaen to ha'
gotten sa thick with a guse!
Sa I danged 'er well as I slummocked on, as ard as ma legs cud stoomp,
"Waaeit till I gets tha, ma laaedy!" I sez,--when, arl on a
sooden ... Boomp!
--An I wur a sprawlin' an' floppin' in wan of the owd Squire's pits,
But fur t' claaey at t' bottom an' that, I mout ha bin brokken to bits!
An' I roared fur 'elp, fur I cudn't git up, an' the watter wur oop to
my chin.
But nobbudy eerd ma a' beaelin', nor thowt on the hole I wur in!
They'd niver find nawthin but boaens, I knawed, if they'd iver the
gumption to dredge,
Then I groaened (_impressively_)--fur I eerd Araminty a tooklin' 'oop
by the edge!
(_Sulky sarcasm._) "Wunnerful funny, beaent it?" I sez, (I wur feaelin'
fit for to choaek.
To be catched loike a bee in a bottle--an' see her enjyin' the joaek!)
(_Indignantly._) "Hevn't ya naw moor manners," I sez, "ya greaet fat
himpident thing!"
(_Pathetically._) Fur I'd bred her oop from a goslin', I had--and theer
wur the sting!
Well, she left ma aloaen at laaest, an' I hedn't a mossel o' hoaepe--
When by coom HARRY the hedger, an a' hoickt ma oop with a roaepe!
"Shudn't ha' heerd 'ee, TAMMAS," he sez, "or knawed as owt wur t'
matter--
Ef it hedn't ha bin fur yon guse o' thine, as coom an raaeised sech
a clatter.
An' drawed ma hon in spite o' mysen--till I moinded the hopen shaaeft!"
(_Catch your breath, then brokenly._) Aye, Minty wur saaevin ma l