not I; I can get favours enough in New-York, if I go
to the expense.--I know what--I suppose you forget when Jack Wrestle, the
country mack-marony--

DOLLY. Oh, oh!

HUMPHRY. Why, in the country you us'd for to kiss me without axing.

DOLLY. I scorn your words, you worthless blackguard; so I do.

[_Cries._

THOMAS. Sir, I'd have you to know, sir, that I won't suffer you, sir, to
abuse this young lady, sir, in this manner, sir; and, sir--in short, sir,
you're a dirty fellow, for your pains, sir.

HUMPHRY. And you're a great litterly lubber, as the saying is; and if
you'll be so friendly as for to fetch the mug of ale you promis'd me, I'll
lick you out of pure gratitude: have a care--grog makes me fight like a
tyger.

THOMAS. It's a bargain,--I shou'd be sorry to try you; but I'll go lace you
ale a little, and that will spoil your fighting, I warrant you.

[_Aside, and exit._

DOLLY. You sha'n't fight him.--Oh, law, I wou'dn't trust myself with him
alone, for the riches of the Indians!

[_Exit, after him._

HUMPHRY. [_Mimicking her._] What an unfaithless trollop! She's got to be
very vartuous since she's liv'd in town, but vartue is but skin deep, as
the saying is:--wou'dn't even let me kiss her;--I meant nothing but the
genteel thing neither,--all in an honest way. I wonder what she can see in
that clumsy booby's face, for to take his part, sooner than I!--but I'll go
buy a new coat and breeches, and get my head fricaseed, and my beard comb'd
a little, and then I'll cut a dash with the best on 'em. I'll go see where
that ill-looking fellow stays with the ale.

[_Exit._

_End of the Second Act._

ACT III.

SCENE I. _A Barber's Shop._

_HUMPHRY in new clothes, reading a newspaper.--TOUPEE shaving him._

HUMPHRY. Pray now, master barber, what does Constitution mean? I hears so
many people a quarrelling about it,--I wish I cou'd get somebody to give me
the exclamation of it; here it is among the news too. It's spelt C, O, N,
con--S, T, I, sti--consti--T, U, tu--constitu--T, I, ti--constituti--O, N,
on--con-sti-tu-ti-on,--but your city folks calls it Constitushon; they've
got such a queer pronouncication.

TOUPEE. Vat you please, sare?

HUMPHRY. Yes, it pleases me well enoug