from Crackenfudge,
of whom it is the type and exponent. For a thousand, it contains a list
of his qualifications for the magisterial honors for which he is
so ambitious. Well, well; I believe every man has an ambition for
something. Mine is to see my daughter a countess, that she may trample
with velvet slippers on the necks of those who would trample on hers if
she were beneath them. This fellow, now, who is both slave and tyrant,
will play all sorts of oppressive pranks upon the poor, by whom he knows
that he is despised; and for that very reason, along with others, will
he punish them. That, however, is, after all, but natural; and on this
very account, curse me, but I shall try and shove the beggarly scoundrel
up to the point of his paltry ambition. I like ambition. The man who has
no object of ambition of any kind is unfit for life. Come, then, wax,
deliver up thy trust.'"

With a dark grin of contempt, and a kind of sarcastic gratification, he
perused the document, which ran as follows:

"My dear Sir Tomas,--In a letter, which a' had the honer of receiving
from you, in consequence of your very great kindness in condescending to
kick me out of your house, on the occasion of my last visit to Red
Hall, you were pleased to express a wish that a' would send you up as
arthentic a list as a' could conveniently make up of my qualifications
for the magistracey. Deed, a'm sore yet, Sir Tomas, and wouldn't it be
a good joke, as my friend Dr. Twig says, if the soreness should remain
until it is cured by the Komission, which he thinks would wipe out all
recollection of the pain and the punishment. And he says, too, that this
application of it would be putting it to a most proper and legutimate
use; the only use, he insists, to which it ought to be put. But a' don't
go that far, because a' think it would be an honerable dockiment, not
only to my posterity, meaning my legutimate progenitors, if a' should
happen to have any; but, also and moreover, to the good taste and
judgment, and respect for the honer and integrity of the Bench,
manifested by those who attributed to place me on it.

"A' now come to Klaim No. I, for the magistracey: In the first place
a'm not without expeyrience, having been in the habit of acting as a
magistrate in a private way, and upon my own responsibility, for several
years. A' established a kourt in a little vilage, which--and this is a
strong point in my feavor now-a-days--which a' meself have depopi