o trot horses in their present condition?"

"Excuse me. Captain," said the Deacon. "I"

"Blank your Captain," roared the voice; "I'm no Captain."

"Major," said the Deacon deprecatingly.

"To thunder with your Majors, you ignorant fool. You"

"I beg your pardon, Colonel. I was"

"What's the matter with you, you ignoramus?" roared the voice, more
indignantly than ever. "Don't you know Brigade Headquarters when you see
them? Don't you know your own officers when you hear their voices?"

"Rayly, General," said the Deacon, much disturbed, "I didn't mean to
insult you. I'm only a citizen, and a stranger in the camp, and--"

"A citizen and a stranger," echoed the voice. "What are you doing in
here, anyway? Orderly, bring that man in here till I see him."

The Orderly started to obey, when a regiment which had been ordered to
report at Headquarters came up at quick step, halted, and ordered arms
with much clatter. The frightened horse bounded off down the road, with
the Deacon sawing on the lines and trying to stop him.

He only slowed down when he came up near a corral of other horses, to
which he turned for companionship and sympathy.

"Frosty mornin' makes that hoss purty frisky," said the Deacon, as he
readjusted his hat, and got himself in shape after his jolting. "Lucky,
though. I didn't like that old General's voice. I'm afraid he had it
in for me, and would 've made me trouble for lowerin' his dignity by
callin' him Captain. Big officers are awfully tetchy."

"Here, who are you? And what are you doin' out there?" came the stem
inquiry from the dark depths of one of the sheds.

"Excuse me. General," answered the Deacon hastily, "I"

"General? Who are you callin' General, you fool? Don't try to be funny
with me. You know I'm no General."

"I meant Colonel," the Deacon started to explain.

"The blazes you did. You expect Colonels to run hoss-corrals, and manage
mule boarding-houses, do you? stop your blimmed nonsense and answer my
questions."

"Major, I was tryin' to say"

"I'll Major you when I git my boots on and git out there. Don't think to
shut my eye up callin' me big titles."

"But, Captain."

"I'm no Captain, neither. I'm plain Jim Crimmins,
Quartermaster-Sergeant, in charge o' this corral, that you're stealin'
around. I'm comin' out there to break every bone in your body. You
infernal sneaks 've pestered the life out o' me stealin' my corn and my
mules, even. I've bin watchin' you piroutin