le may indeed be afraid, that if
they did not assume, they would be trampled upon. A very narrow fear,
however, since they trample upon themselves, who can fear this. But this
man must be secure that humility would be an ornament to him.

He has talents indeed: but those talents and his personal advantages
have been snares to him. It is plain they have. And this shews, that,
weighed in an equal balance, he would be found greatly wanting.

Had my friends confided as they did at first, in that discretion which
they do not accuse me of being defective in, I dare say I should have
found him out: and then should have been as resolute to dismiss him, as
I was to dismiss others, and as I am never to have Mr. Solmes. O that
they did but know my heart!--It shall sooner burst, than voluntarily,
uncompelled, undriven, dictate a measure that shall cast a slur either
upon them, or upon my sex.

Excuse me, my dear friend, for these grave soliloquies, as I may call
them. How have I run from reflection to reflection!--But the occasion is
recent--They are all in commotion below upon it.

Shorey says, that Mr. Lovelace watched my mother's eye, and bowed to
her: and she returned the compliment. He always admired my mother. She
would not, I believe, have hated him, had she not been bid to hate him:
and had it not been for the rencounter between him and her only son.

Dr. Lewen was at church; and observing, as every one else did, the
disorder into which Mr. Lovelace's appearance* had put all our family,
was so good as to engage him in conversation, when the service was over,
till they were all gone to their coaches.

* See Letter XXXI, for Mr. Lovelace's account of his
behaviour and intentions in his appearance at church.

My uncles had my letters in the morning. They, as well as my father,
are more and more incensed against me, it seems. Their answers, if
they vouchsafe to answer me, will demonstrate, I doubt not, the
unseasonableness of this rash man's presence at our church.

They are angry also, as I understand, with my mother, for returning
his compliment. What an enemy is hatred, even to the common forms of
civility! which, however, more distinguish the payer of a compliment,
than the receiver. But they all see, they say, that there is but one way
to put an end to his insults. So I shall suffer: And in what will the
rash man have benefited himself, or mended his prospects?

I am extremely apprehensive that this