round and
bellow. Not that there was any blood or carrion there, but the cow acted
that way. She may have got the smell of a Democrat from his clothes.
Anyway she made Monterey howl, and the large man in the water dove down
for stones to throw at the cow. She had run one horn through one leg of
his pants, and the other horn through the broad part, and was engaged
in chewing his shirt, when a rock struck her on the rump and she started
off with those two garments for the blind asylum, where she evidently
belonged, shaking her head to get the pants off her horns, and chewing
the shirt as though it was a bran mash..

The pious man rushed out of the water towards the cow and said "co-boss,
co-boss," but she took one look at his shape and turned away and didn't
co-boss very much. A war map of the thoughts of this Janesville business
man, as he saw the cow go away, would sell well, if it was illustrated
by a picture of a native Zulu picking buchu leaves. He said he was a
pious man, and had always tried to lead a different life, and do the
fair thing, but hereafter he would be blanked if he wouldn't kill every
blanked cow that he came across.

The only things the cow had left were his hat, vest and shoes and
stockings. He put them on and started after the cow. The vest was one of
these grandfather's clock vests, that stop short, never to go again, a
sort of emigrant vest, that comes high. It was not a long, lingering,
emotional vest; it was not what would be called a charitable vest,
because charity begins at home, and covers a multitude of back pay into
the treasury. He tried to remember some of the ten commandments, to
repeat, but the only one he could call to mind was "Pull down Thy Vest."

His eyes swept the horizon to see if anybody was looking, and he could
see that the grounds about the blind asylum were alive with people
of both sexes. He thanked heaven that by the inscrutable ways of
Providence, people were made blind, but his joy at the calamity was
mingled with sorrow when he thought that the teachers at the asylum were
endowed with the most perfect eyesight.

As the cow neared the gate of the grounds he made one effort to head her
off, but she run by him, and then he attempted to take his pistol from
the hind pocket of his pants to kill himself, when he realized again
that he was indeed barefooted from his vest to his stockings, and he
sat down under a tree to die of slow starvation, but before he began to
star