" she stated baldly.

"Hay? ... mumble!"

Senator Jones said, "I'm afraid I did not quite understand your reply,
madam."

"I hold no degrees, honors, or diplomas whatever, and I have not wasted
one second of my life in any college, university, academy, or other
alleged institution of learning. The degrees good enough for Roger
Bacon, Erasmus Darwin, Lavoisier, Linnaeus and Lamarck are good enough
for me. I am a questioner, gentlemen, a learner, not a collector of
alphabetical letters which, strung together in any form your fancy
pleases, continue eternally to spell nothing whatever."

Sensation. One of the experts who had been waiting patiently to testify,
folded his arms and said in a loud voice, "This is what comes of
tolerating women in the professions." Another muttered, "Charlatan ...
ridiculous ... dangerous thing ... shameful ... sex ..." Two elderly
ladies in broadcloth coats with fur collars, later identified as
crusaders for antivivisection, cheered feebly and were promptly ejected.

Senator Jones took off his spectacles, polished them exhaustively, tried
to put them on upside down, gave up and stated gravely, "This is an
extraordinary admission, Miss, um, Francis."

"It is not an admission at all; it is a statement of fact. As for its
irregularity, I take the liberty of believing we unlettered ones are in
the majority rather than minority."

Judge Robinson warned, "Could be cited for contempt, Miss Harrumph."

Dr Johnson said sharply, "Nonsense, madam, even a--even a tree surgeon
has more respect for learning."

Mr Miller leaned slightly over the table. "Do you realize that in your
ignorant dabbling you have ruined hundreds of propertyowners and
taxpayers?"

"I thought there was some law against practicing without a license,"
speculated Assemblyman Brown.

"There is apparently no law applying intelligence qualifications for
members of the legislature," remarked Miss Francis pleasantly.

Senator Jones lifted his gavel, idle until now, and banged it on the
table, smashing his spectacles thoughtlessly placed in front of him a
moment before. This did nothing to appease his rising choler. "Silence,
madam! We have perhaps been too lenient in deference to your, um, sex.
I'll remind you that this body is vested with all the dignity of the
state of California. Unless you apologize instantly I shall cite you for
contempt."

"I beg the committee's pardon."

The investigators held a whispered conference