ntinued Lucy. "You know what these
homes are?" Mrs. Robarts assured her that she knew very well, and
then Lucy went on: "A year ago I should have said that I was the last
girl in England to think of such a life, but I do believe now that it
would be the best thing for me. And then I'll starve myself, and flog
myself, and in that way I'll get back my own mind and my own soul."

"Your own soul, Lucy!" said Mrs. Robarts, in a tone of horror.

"Well, my own heart, if you like it better; but I hate to hear myself
talking about hearts. I don't care for my heart. I'd let it go--with
this young popinjay lord or any one else, so that I could read, and
talk, and walk, and sleep, and eat, without always feeling that I was
wrong here--here--here--" and she pressed her hand vehemently against
her side. "What is it that I feel, Fanny? Why am I so weak in body
that I cannot take exercise? Why cannot I keep my mind on a book for
one moment? Why can I not write two sentences together? Why should
every mouthful that I eat stick in my throat? Oh, Fanny, is it his
legs, think you, or is it his title?" Through all her sorrow--and she
was very sorrowful--Mrs. Robarts could not help smiling. And, indeed,
there was every now and then something even in Lucy's look that was
almost comic. She acted the irony so well with which she strove to
throw ridicule on herself! "Do laugh at me," she said. "Nothing
on earth will do me so much good as that; nothing, unless it be
starvation and a whip. If you would only tell me that I must be a
sneak and an idiot to care for a man because he is good-looking and
a lord!"

"But that has not been the reason. There is a great deal more in Lord
Lufton than that; and since I must speak, dear Lucy, I cannot but say
that I should not wonder at your being in love with him, only--only
that--"

"Only what? Come, out with it. Do not mince matters, or think that I
shall be angry with you because you scold me."

"Only that I should have thought that you would have been too guarded
to have--have cared for any gentleman till--till he had shown that he
cared for you."

"Guarded! Yes, that's it; that's just the word. But it's he that
should have been guarded. He should have had a fire-guard hung before
him, or a love-guard, if you will. Guarded! Was I not guarded, till
you all would drag me out? Did I want to go there? And when I was
there, did I not make a fool of myself, sitting in a corner, and
thinking how much bett