w. You cannot, I think,
teach a child to grow great.

But you can teach a child to dance and swim and shoot and sail, and to
ride and to be polite, and to keep clean, and by example rather than
precept, to be natural and unaffected! It was hoped then that I would
be a great man; in the event, however, of my turning out to be nothing
but a butterfly, I was brought up to be as ornamental a butterfly as
possible. I cannot remember when I wasn't being prepared and groomed
to take, without awkwardness, a place in society.

Well-bred grown-ups talk to children, without affectation or
condescension, as if they too were grown-ups. My parents were always
entertaining people, and it was assumed without comment that I too was
host no less than they. Twice a day I had to be in evidence: at tea
time, face and hands shining clean, hair carefully brushed, my small
body covered with crisp white duck, black silk stockings, on my legs,
and patent leather pumps on my feet. No conversation was required of
me, but if I had forgotten a name and the face that went with it, I was
allowed to feel uncomfortable; allowed to feel as a grown man feels
when he has accidentally said something that would better have been
left unsaid. It was my duty to go accurately from guest to guest, to
shake hands, and to say perfectly naturally not "Hunh!" as so many
modern children do, but "How do you do, Mrs. Lessing," or "How do you
do, Mrs. Green," and not to stare and fidget or be awkward. Then I had
my tea, discolored hot water with sugar and cream, my buttered toast,
and a bit of cake. After that my mother would make it exceedingly easy
for me to get away. My second public appearance was just before
dinner. Then, dressed once more in white and patent leather, I came to
the drawing-room to wish and be wished good night.

To obey my mother, when there was no real temptation to disobey her,
was very easy, and nobody ever saw me look sulky or balky when I was
told to do this or that. It was easy to obey her, because from the
first, she took it absolutely for granted that she was going to be
obeyed. Of course it was different with general orders designed to
cover long periods of time, for here the tempter had his chance at me,
and I was forever falling. "Stop kicking the table leg, Archie," is an
order easily and instantly obeyed. For "Never kick a table," I cannot
say the same. I used to divide her orders into two classes: The now
nows and th