, I should even now
have denied to God or man with complete conviction. I had no interest
in the causes of her descent, only in the fact of it. And all that
time of bungling dressing for dinner I kept thinking, not that I should
help her look for a new heaven, but that I must try, as her true
friend, to get her back into her old one. At that time John Fulton had
no better friend than I. It seemed to me really terrible that things
should have gone wrong with these two.

My father came in while I was still dressing.

"Hear you've given up California," he said bluntly; "do you think
that's wise? . . . Where do you keep your bell?"

I showed him.

"How many times do you ring if you want a cocktail?"

"Twice. If you'll ring four times I'll have one with you. I spilt
mine."

So my father pushed the bell four times and complimented me on my love
of system and order, and then he returned to his first question.

"Do you think it wise?"

"Well, father," I said, "we've always been pretty good friends. Will
you tell me why you think it isn't wise?"

"Yes, I will," he said; "I think it's foolish for a man to run after
women in his own class for any other purpose than matrimony."

"So do I!" said I.

"A man," he persisted, "doesn't always know that he is running after a
woman. Nature will fool him. Look at young lovers! Why, they
actually believe in the beautiful fabric of spiritual poetry that they
weave about each other. And nature lets 'em. But men who have seen
life, and have lived, as I shouldn't be at all surprised if you had,
for instance, are able to see the ugly mundane facts through the rosy
mist. My boy, you and Lucy Fulton are being talked about. You don't
have to tell me it's none of my business, I know that. But I can't
help wanting you to steer clear of rows, and I don't want to see any
woman get mud thrown on her because of you. For a man of course,
unfortunately, consequences never amount to much. It's for the woman
that I should plead if I had any eloquence or persuasiveness. I'd say
to you, don't run away for your own sake, that's not worth while; but
run away for hers. Now you will forgive me, my dear fellow, won't you,
for butting in like this. . . ."

The cocktails came, and when the man who brought them had gone, I said:

"It's for her sake that I'm staying, father; will you listen a little?
You're the only man in the world that I can talk to without fear of
being repeated.