an good. The news
reaches Lancelot that his lady and sweetheart is dead. You need have
no doubt of the grief he felt; every one may feel sure that he was
afflicted and overcome with grief. Indeed, if you would know the truth,
he was so downcast that he held his life in slight esteem. He wished to
kill himself at once, but first he uttered a brief lament. He makes
a running noose at one end of the belt he wore, and then tearfully
communes thus with himself: "Ah, death, how hast thou spied me out and
undone me, when in the bloom of health! I am undone, and yet I feel no
pain except the grief within my heart. This is a terrible mortal grief.
I am willing that it should be so, and if God will, I shall die of it.
Then can I not die some other way, without God's consent? Yes, if he
will let me tie this noose around my neck. I think I can compel death,
even against her will, to take my life. Death, who covets only those
who fear her, will not come to me; but my belt will bring her within my
power, and as soon as she is mine, she will execute my desire. But, in
truth, she will come too tardily for me, for I yearn to have her now!"
Then he delays and hesitates no longer, but adjusts his head within the
noose until it rests about his neck; and in order that he may not
fail to harm himself, he fastens the end of the belt tightly about the
saddle-bow, without attracting the attention of any one. Then he let
himself slide to earth, intending his horse to drag him until he was
lifeless, for he disdains to live another hour. When those who ride with
him see him fallen to earth, they suppose him to be in a faint, for no
one sees the noose which he had attached about his neck. At once they
caught him in their arms and, on raising him, they found the noose which
he had put around his neck and with which he sought to kill himself.
They quickly cut the noose; but the noose had so hurt his throat that
for some time he could not speak; the veins of his neck and throat are
almost broken. Now he could not harm himself, even had he wished to
do so; however, he is grieved that they have laid hands on him, and he
almost burns up with rage, for willingly would he have killed himself
had no one chanced to notice him. And now when he cannot harm himself,
he cries: "Ah, vile and shameless death! For God's sake, why hadst thou
not the power and might to kill me before my lady died? I suppose it
was because thou wouldst not deign to do what might be a ki