may easily gain or lose a
friend for life. When no other guests are arriving, you can chatter to
your own friends as much as you like, but as you turn to greet another
stranger, you must show pleasure, not annoyance, in giving him your
attention.

A happy attitude to cultivate is to think in your own mind that new people
are all packages in a grab-bag, and that you can never tell what any of
them may prove to be until you know what is inside the outer wrappings of
casual appearances. To be sure, the old woman of the fairy tale, who turns
out to be a fairy in disguise, is not often met with in real life, but
neither is her approximate counterpart an impossibility.

As those who have sent you flowers approach, you must thank them; you must
also write later an additional note of thanks to older people. But to
your family or your own intimate friends, the verbal thanks--if not too
casually made--are sufficient.

=A FEW DON'TS FOR DEBUTANTES=

Don't think that because you have a pretty face, you need neither brains
nor manners. Don't think that you can be rude to anyone and escape being
disliked for it.

Whispering is always rude. Whispering and giggling at the same time have
no place in good society. Everything that shows lack of courtesy toward
others is rude.

If you would be thought a person of refinement, don't nudge or pat or
finger people. Don't hold hands or walk arm-about-waist in public. Never
put your hand on a man, except in dancing and in taking his arm if he is
usher at a wedding or your partner for dinner or supper. Don't allow
anyone to paw you. Don't hang on anyone for support, and don't stand or
walk with your chest held in, and your hips forward, in imitation of a
reversed letter S.

Don't walk across a ballroom floor swinging your arms. Don't talk or laugh
loud enough to attract attention, and on no account force yourself to
laugh. Nothing is flatter than laughter that is lacking in mirth. If you
only laugh because something is irresistibly funny, the chances are your
laugh will be irresistible too. In the same way a smile should be
spontaneous, because you _feel_ happy and pleasant; nothing has less
allure than a mechanical grimace, as though you were trying to imitate a
tooth-paste advertisement.

=WHERE ARE THE "BELLES" OF YESTERDAY?=

In olden days and until a comparatively short while ago, a young girl's
social success was invariably measured by her popularity in a ballroom. It
was th