t over night.

=GIFTS WHICH MAY AND THOSE WHICH MAY NOT BE ACCEPTED=

The fiancee of a young man who is "saving in order to marry," would be
lacking in taste as well as good sense were she to encourage or allow him
extravagantly to send her flowers and other charming, but wasteful,
presents. But on the other hand, if the bridegroom-elect has plenty of
means, she may not only accept flowers but anything he chooses to select,
except wearing apparel or a motor car or a house and furniture--anything
that can be classified as "maintenance."

It is perfectly suitable for her to drive his car, or ride his horse, and
she may select furniture for their house, which he may buy or have built.
But, if she would keep her self-respect, the car must not become hers nor
must she live in the house or use its furniture until she is given his
name. He may give her all the jewels he can afford, he may give her a fur
scarf, but not a fur coat. The scarf is an ornament, the coat is wearing
apparel. If she is very poor, she may have to be married in cheese-cloth,
or even in the dress she wears usually, but her wedding dress and the
clothes she wears away, must not be supplied by the groom or his family.
There is one exception: if his mother, for instance, has some very
wonderful family lace, or has kept her own wedding dress and has no
daughter herself, and it would please her to have her son's wife wear her
lace or dress, it is proper for the bride to consent. But it would be
starting life on a false basis, and putting herself in a category with
women of another class, to be clothed by any man, whether he is soon to be
her husband or not.

If the engagement should be so unfortunate as to be broken off, the
engagement ring and all other gifts of value must be returned.

CHAPTER XXI

FIRST PREPARATIONS BEFORE A WEDDING

To begin with, before deciding the date of the wedding, the bride's mother
must find out definitely on which day the clergyman who is to perform the
ceremony is disengaged, and make sure that the church is bespoken for no
other service. If it is to be an important wedding, she must also see that
the time available for the church is also convenient to the caterer.

Sundays, and days in Lent, are not chosen for weddings, and Friday being a
"fast" day in Catholic and very "high" Episcopal churches, weddings on
that day, if not forbidden, are never encouraged. But the superstition
that Friday and the month of May